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The Black Dog...

To him the world seemed to have changed and he was no longer who he used to be, he had been battling the black dog for a number of years now, as a result of a very painful and what was at times a debilitating injury, he had tried many different medications, most had side effects that he could not tolerate, and those that didn't, were not really that helpful.

He had seen his life change in ways that he never thought were possible, he no longer enjoyed going out with friends, his family no longer wanted to see him, or so he was being told, and he had become isolated at home, he could no longer work as he had done before, and he no longer found joy in anything.

He had for a time resorted to watching ****, to try and feel something, and this did not work, he realised it was not the way and ceased this, but it only created other problems for him, the medications at times messed with his head so much, that he found it hard know right from wrong, and he found himself doing things, that before the black dog, he would not have even though about.

At times he used to self medicate with alcohol, and this only made things worse, he no longer does this though, but he now sits wondering if he will ever return to the person that he was, whether his life will ever be the same again, and whether he will ever be part of his family again.


plaful plaful 51-55 1 Response Aug 5, 2012

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From what it seems...you battle an inner demon, who wants to take everything you loved and had passion for away...I wonder how this demon manifested into your mind, how hard did you try to fight back to win back what was yours? Medications often mask one's true afflictions, it fries their brain, a walking zombie, time passes and nothing changes. Medications are just a substitute for the real cure, that is motivation and change that you have capable of. Layful you have the power to end this madness, and return to the life you once knew. What kind of meds are you taking? I suggest other alternatives for depression, a wonderful therapist could assist you and talk you through your problems Layful. An outlet to explain the cause of your downfall, even help you with your drinking problem...once you go down a path it's hard to leave it but it's NOT impossible believe me. I wish the best of luck for you and my prayers are with you. I will try to guide your lost soul from the dark and into the light. It's the best I can do.