Turning Darkness Into Light...

Hi.  I'm new to this group and I have battled major depression off and on since I was 13.  I have been fighting the biggest battle with my depression over the last 6 years.  It is has been a lonely, frightening, isolating sub-existence.  However, through my progress in coming to terms with the causes, triggers, and down-times, I have discovered a new strength within myself as well as new interests and talents I did not know I had.  I have described my depression in metaphorical terms to those closest to me in an effort to help them understand better what I am experiencing.  Often I feel like someone standing on the outside of everything and everyone around me, wanting to be a part of, included in, etc., but at the same time feeling numb and pulled back into a space of malignant despair that I find hard to describe in words.  Through the help of an incredible psychologist, a loving husband and the support of friends, I'm slowly beginning to "feel" again and interact again with others.  I would like to talk with others here who have had to struggle with, live with depression and learn how they, you, have learned to cope and recover...
Ianna Ianna
36-40, F
2 Responses May 14, 2007

Hi, i am a 62 year old woman and have battled bouts of deep depression all of my life. On Dec.27 05, depression won for a short season. I had been seeing a councelor for several months, i lost interest in food, could not eat ,wanted to die. Finally i was at my medicine nurses office and could not stop crying. I volenteered to be hospitalised. A police officer came to her office and escorted to an ambulance. I was taken to a hospital psych ward until about 10 pm, they then took me by ambulance to a hospital several miles away ,i was terrified. looking back it was a good thing. I have recieved excellant care. I have been seeing an excllant psychchitist, counceling and belong to an adult child of alcoholics group. I was really afraid,it has not been an easy road, i am beginning to see a bright light at the end of the abyss of dark depression, i am on meds counciling etc. I want to encourage you there is hope!!

Hi, I feel for you. I have recurring bouts of depression, not all the time like some, so I think I'm lucky that way. There are many ways < I think to feel and heal, I'm glad you have a good support network. At one of my very low points , some years ago, my mantra became "nothing is forever " and it just helped me cope on a daily basis. take care xx