Every Day

I have battled depression since I was 29. It all started when I was in school in San Diego and had a major panic attack. After that day I started having them daily and finally went to the ER because I actually thought I was having a heart attack. However, once they checked me out they gave me some Valium and it made me feel normal again. They sent me home with some Xanax and that helped me out alot. However, when the Xanax wore off I would get another panic attack. I finished school in San Diego and flew back to Virginia heavily medicated it was the only way I could get home without freaking out on the plane. During this period of time I became very depressed also. I was in the Navy at the time and it became almost impossible to get through the day. I did a deployment and made it through but saw some really bad stuff which didn't help matters. When I got back from deployment my father died we were close and I had lost my rock. That was the final straw I could no longer function so I had to get transferred off my ship and got a medical discharge. I did not want this but I really had no other option. Thank god for my ex-wife she helped me out alot during my lowest points. Since then it has been a constant struggle just to wake up in the morning. I take my meds and do the best I can thats all I can do.
Walkingcontradiction93 Walkingcontradiction93
36-40, M
1 Response Jan 7, 2013

hey man, I cant wake up anymore these days....when i do i lie on the couch....my ex brings food in and makes me a few meals here and there ....so i went from having a pretty full life to this weird existence.....wow....i can see you have suffered many years but somehow keep getting thru....well (insert sear word) great on you zza ! we need to keep moving and always looking for a a few little tricks ti put in our toolbelt to make things more bearable

i so wanna be happy go lucky again...i miss myself

keep on keeping on...we are many!!