Black Hole

I am 26 and for so mant years of my life i battle deppression. I was just a little girl about 4 years old and had a ulcer from stress.. WHat 4 year old has too much stress... anyways.. It grew from there.. I had a very abusive daddy and a mom that was to afraid to help. It continued untl i was 16 and got married. The purpose of marrage for me was to get OUT of there not for love. SO ofcourse that marrage didn't last to long. Long enough to have 3 children though. They are beautiful.... i then moved back home with mom after my mom and daddy got divorced.. I had my children with me and boy did i just make everyone so annoyed by my deppression... I was guess i was unhappy and scared and didnt want everyone to be happy ethier.. Then I met a man.. a wounderful man... He has 2 children who lived with him also.. we decided to give it a shot... finally got married... we were doing good for the most part and then i was raped in 2006.. that was thee worst thing thats ever happened to me.. Now What part of that door to my hart that was opeon is now closed ... i find it hard to even open it for my husband... Theres nothing bad happening but i still find my self sad, lonely, confused.. DEPPRESSED... Hopefully some day i will truley be happy .... my life is great now though and i am still having a really hard time... so then again maybe it was written in stone before i was born that i will be a miserable person forever.......
lifeafter lifeafter
26-30, F
Jun 2, 2007