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Never Ending

I get so, I have no ambition to do anything, have trouble getting to do anything. Derive little or no pleasure from much of anything.

Don't know what the answer is, sometimes it gets a little easier but not often. I have a wife & 2 daughters, both grown. One is damn addict, pathological liar, and has been in out of rehabs more time than I can count. Also maybe bi-polar has been diagnosed as such, but don't see how anyone can really know when she has been on various drugs both street & legal for the last 20 years, she continues to manipulate my wife, and leaves a trail of misery behind her, is in seems incapable of making any correct decision. has never worked, and has attempted suicide several times. My other daughter who is 40 is also diagnosed bipolar and has graduated from college and holds a master's degree, but is incapable of working, but does not lie or abuse drugs, was married, divorced, got into an abusive relationship and lost everything.

I have a decent pension & soc security, my wife doesn't work, can't get a job, and has a lot of health issues. I work full time for health insurance primarily for my wife, my salary and income goes almost completely to support these people and I see no way out of it ever.

The drug addict will come whining about something real or made up, when she gets in too much trouble, she goes to a rehab, does real well while in there, then fails to follow any advice she is given when she leaves, she lived with until a few years ago, when I finally refused to allow it to continue.

Sadly, my wife will constantly accept her back and start finding ways to give her money or whatever else she needs.

so here I am, Happy Retirement, my 401k has twindled to a fraction of it was 8 years because of the continuing bailing out of my children.. and trying to keep my wife from going completely nuts. (which we may all ready be)

The job I have sucks, and I have like, 1 friend.

Kinda think my life has been and continues to be a waste sometimes thing, better off gone, but despite this, I do love my wife & daughter(s), but feel they are literally sucking the life out of me.

Oh, yes, I have had counseling and am on anti-depressants, think I ve been on just about everything that you can think, seems like Prozac works best for me, but doesn't really kill the depression, just kinda makes it somewhat tolerable.

I guess I could go on and on, but what is the point ?

So have a great day !!

 

Throckmorton Throckmorton 61-65 Oct 5, 2008

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