Stuck In the Middle of Nothing
I feel I have been shafted since I was born. Everything that seems to be going well turns into crap. I have had a major set back everytime. It all started when I was 6. Somthing bad happen to me at school. I do not remeber what it was. Since that day or time my life has been not very good. Even though I try. After the incedent I suffferd from school phobia. I was finnaly diagnosed with it 5 years later. Scared everyday I went to school. Being forced and treatend. When they finaly diagnosed me with it I pretty much hated everyone. But I got help.( meds and home schooled) Again this was before they have all this extra stuff for kids that go through it. I missed it about 5 years. haha
Home school sucked. I had great teachers. But the whole staying home by myself for the whole day and telling myself to do home work was hell. I started to become more introverted. Never talking to anyone. And then I was diagnosed with social phobia. Yea more pills... I hate pills. And that seem to be there cure. What really makes me angry is if I did not have this problem I could have taken college courses by the time I turned 16. (It wasfor math as you can see it was not for my grammer) But since I could not go to any kind of learning instiute, I was screwed.
And thats where depression and my last phobia comes in. Agrophobia. Since I was stuck at home doing home all day,I just started to get to complacent. I quit school. Could not take teaching my self for the most part. Since the teacher was there for an hour. I tried to get jobs but I did not last long. I would panick and just quit.
Now Iam stuck. And Iam looking for an awnser. Thats why Iam trying this. I try to keep a good outlook on life. Buts its getting harder everyday.