So sometimes I feel like I'm doing so great and life is good and everything isn't perfect but it's manageable and I think I can handle life. But then outta nowhere it hits me and everything around me just turns to **** and I feel completely hopeless like my life is just one big waste of space. Like I have no idea why I'm even here. Why does it happen ?? Majority of the time it feels like I struggle through it only to repeat the process and feel like I have made no progress ... Will this go on forever ? What is the meaning of living ?
bix101 bix101
26-30, F
2 Responses Aug 20, 2014

<p>There's this temptation to think that "if I just do all the right things, it won't happen again", and when it comes back it feels like a failure. But that's part of thinking that it is somehow your fault to begin with -- which it is not. It wasn't your fault when it started, and it isn't "your fault" when it comes back.</p><p>Part of what has helped me is learning to say "it's just a feeling" ... it is not "you". It still feels bad -- I'm not minimizing that. But not connecting your identity to the feeling is crucial.</p><p>And then, for me, it has been a life-long process of recreating my internal life -- my thinking and how I relate to the world -- so as to make it less likely, less often that "it hits me". Not never, not immune... just less often. And then when it does, to simply ride it out -- like a storm -- and collect tricks that help me do that ... exercise being most useful for me, and staying away from things that reinforce the bad feelings.</p><p>Hope that's in some way helpful...</p><p>~gwyon~</p>

So helpful, just in the mere fact that I am not alone !!

Yeah i couldnt have said it better myself, its like as you say things aren't brilliant, but there manageable and your getting by and staying positive, then all of a sudden its like your hit by a wall in the face!
Mines like that too. i always thought depression was either with you or not.
Life was either great or awful. i never thought itd just be like a noose round my neck even when times are good and i thought i was progressing.