Good Saturday morning EP!

Well maybe for everyone but naturally not for the monster like me that has no one but EP...

Same feelings as always... Same tears, with same sunny disposition...

Everyone always says it gets better... 3 months now... Trust me nothing works...
lostunit lostunit
31-35, M
5 Responses Aug 23, 2014

If you dwell on your problems and are always negative emotionally healthy people won't hang out around you and that makes you lonely which exacerbates depression. Log off the computer and do something that will make you feel better about yourself.

www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20140818190427-50578967-9-things-successful-people-won-t-do

As posted on another post. You will notice I can't leave my home

Sorry. That makes it harder because isolation makes depression worse. Message me if you want someone to talk to for company.

Don't try it but hurting other will probably relieve tensions. Don't actually hurt people. Play football or something with friends then its ok

What!

I have no friends! First of all!

Second I'm not going out of my way to hurt being! Unlike you who comes into my post shooting off about me hurting people and telling me to play with friends I don't got!

Moral is, want to be a jerk, than go else where!

I am sorry if I came off as a jerk. I want to help so badly. I'm sorry.

You were rude... Don't hurt others... Where in my post did I say I was going to hurt others? Where in any of my post have I ever said I was going to hurt others.

Friends... Had you been really wanting to help you would read my profile and my stories and notice that I have no friends, no family, no job, and that I'm on medical leave for attempted suicide... And on watch...

Lesson number one. Never jump at someone. It may offend or upset them.

Lesson number two. Have a understand, or a supportive words that flow easy.

Lesson 3 remember that a depressed person my not be in a good state of mind, being rude, and non supportive or questions seem to bring more harm than good. Than either walk away or change it up.

My state of mind is suppressed at the moment, so there I helped you out some. Maybe for next time.

I am sorry if I worsened the situation. I don't trust myself at all now to attempt to help. I would say have a good day or night but I fear you would find that to be hollow and with our care. Ill leave you alone. I am sorry

Enjoy it nick.

Your right I won't have a good night. But I'll sleep. Which is better than not.

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They says oneday will be okay just let go for now ! Trust me its 8 yrs gone nothing happen as far. Not even single day past without teardrops & emptiness. Dark depression, social anxiety and solitary life ruined everything ! I buried my all hopes , dreams & desires nothing left in heart ! I feeling bit lite after that ! Now just surviving everyday life with usual loneliness & pro solitude person!

Than your stronger than me.

See, girls are stronger than guys.

Or losers...

I ve no clue about that but i m failed already ! Just want to hope for only oneday happiness but that always my worst day of year !

There hasn't been happiness in my life for 3 months now.

Trust you me... This is the longest I've gone without coming back around and the thoughts to end my life are still very much real and strong. I've played all my games at least twice thru and now they just make me cry.

Hey guys you two.. what are you doing to change that ? burying or ignoring or complaining for that matters wont take issues away.. I feel your pain .. It is difficult to move.. but are you trying to move ? what if you try to concentrate in trying ? what happened it happened already you cannot change it.. let it go

No that doesn't.

You are not trying to move because you are feeling conformable feeling pain and that's a choice too, I'm nobody to judge that..
Living expecting things from people just hurt you..because they wont fill your expectations.. they don't know what are you expecting? can you make them to give you what you want ? no!.. give the benefit of the doubt.. dont expect.. get the things you like..discard the ones you dont..
Living to fill the expectations of other thats even worse because you are voiding yourself to comply to others thinking, there is no way to keep up to that, there is no way to make everybody happy or proud of you..
Do whatever you want for you! no others.. if somebody like to join..welcome.. enjoy that.. if not.. who cares.. You have to like yourself to make others to think: "Hey I like that.. I want to be there, I want to share that" you cannot control others emotions or feelings or actions just the way how you handle those..
Just think about it ;-)

Comfort in feeling pain... Nah...

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Do you like orange juice? I've always found a good glass of orange juice does some to lift the spirits.

All I drink now is 5 alive...

No need to trail off. Is there a reason why you only drink Five Alive?

Cause pop reminds me of her, water I drink to but meh. 5 alive is healthy.

Like I said try some orange juice haha

Orange juice is in 5alive...

It's in it but it's like a juice cocktail isn't it? The individual juice is entirely different.

Perhaps...

Maybe maybe maybe. Give it a try. It might work :P Isn't it worth a try? Just a little try 😉

Orange juice would actually be bad for me just as much as five alive is. I'm bleeding in the stomach. Likely ulcers

Well then why do you drink it XD

...

Don't be trailing off on me I'm actually interested.

Its in my fridge I haven't been drinking it today.

You have asked what I drink. I told you that cause normally that is what I drink.

And my question was why you drink it.

Taste good.

There you go. There are different flavors right? Do you have a favorite or do you just reach for whatever?

Reach for whatever now.

What about before? One flavor must have stood out at some point. Whether it's that odd hint of banana or that confusing citrus of mango.

Nope.

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I've been there many times. It's not that nothing works. Nothing you've tried works. Something will. Eventually. Are you in counseling? You have to find the root causes.

Root causes is the memories.

Ok. I have those too. Real bad ones. You have to somehow work through them. It's a long process. Not easy but not impossible. I'm still working on it in my life. Are you getting help?

I keep having setbacks. I know it's hard. I feel stuck. Like it's never going to change. That's depression. It's a hard fight.

Forced help, volunteered health suicide watch/house arrest.

Did your family intervene? How'd you get there?

I have no family! Disowned.

No friends they all moved on.

My very first story tells you about my life growing up.

I thank you for trying to help. But in trying we all must understand that people always have a story. And some stories will break a heart.

No police intervened

I found it. Your first post. Took awhile. It's a very sad story.

I feel like I screwed up my life. I had a lot happen in my childhood, too. Bad things. It's hard to go forward. I know. I go back a lot. But it's a prison that keeps us from living now.

I fight the urge to end it as well. Some days I feel it stronger than others. It always lingers in some form.

I guess it's like two dogs in a fight. One is good. One is evil. Whichever one we feed will be stronger. Sometimes the good one wins. Sometimes the bad.

I'll read more of your posts. If you read mine you'll see I understand. It's not the same. But I feel like life is so hard. Too hard to fight to stay. But I'm still here. And so are you. You are here. Please don't leave. Are you sure you know what's on the other side for you?

Thank you for reading it and having some understanding.

As per request I will read yours. I'm not one to judge or compare unless the comparest is like what's the difference between a dime and a penny.

You fight to remain... I'm fighting to leave...

No I don't know what's on the other side. But I'm sure its better than living a life of lies and being used and abused...

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