Need to Tell

I am finding things really hard today. How do I rid myself of this feeling of anxiety, apathy and desperation. I am filled with self loathing about being inadequate at work, too busy to give quality time to those at home, and feeling like I have no value- yet having to be the 'glue' that holds things together and appear to be coping well. Will it get any worse because I really don't think I can do it any more?  I am a good person, I cannot say NO. I consider what people at work may think of me above what my family may think of me- I am so busy rushing around that my husband and young son may think they are not in my list of priorities. They are so important to me, but I have got myself in deep and cannot get out of this black hole. They need me. I need them, and love and value them. What am I doing? How can I change this? Bereavement, anxiety, fertility problems, financial difficulty, stress and fear of letting people down is making my mind race and I am in panic mode inside. Thank you for listening and I am sorry to fill this page with negativity.

anxietyrulesme anxietyrulesme
31-35, F
1 Response Mar 4, 2009

I think you know what you need to do really. It sounds like you know that you worry about what people outside of your family think about you too much. This means you don't put enough of your energy into maintaining your family relationships.<br />
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Sounds like you need to reasess why you need the approval of others (not family approval - that's important to have) and cut back on taking any extra responsibilities that will reduce the time you get to spend with family. <br />
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You sound like a lovely person who truly cares about her family. Maybe the problem is really that you don't get time to show it?