I am 25. I have a wonderful wife and beautiful daughter. I work for an organization that makes a difference in the lives of hundred of kids. objectively, I have a good life.

In spite of all this I feel as if my emotions are trying to suffocate every ounce of life out of me. As if there is a 1000 ton boulder that is crushing my soul. I feel detached from most everything, as if I do not belong any where. I feel purposeless.

I have many people who would call me "friend" yet in every place I feel alone. I remember the lyrics of a song that described it as being lost in a sea of faces. I feel as if I am a ghost.

I feel crazy. I feel empty. I feel defeated.
srg11 srg11
26-30, M
3 Responses Aug 25, 2014

Depression is a disease like any other, it can effect anyone

There are some great resources at www.beyondblue.org.au

Church is meant to be a place where anyone can come and they are welcomed. Some churches aren't like that.. My church is I'm not very social and I still feel welcomed. There is a children choir and we start the service by saying hello to people and telling each other who we are. It's pretty nice. I think you should go try some churches because loneliness is not good at all.

That's exactly the words I use to describe how I'm feeling.
Are you on medication? It had helped me. I also did partial hospitalization, where you go in a few hours per say for therapy groups. That was helpful as well.
I'm with Kaiser and they have free weekly group therapy. Oddly, you feel so much better being with a group of ppl that understand how you feel.
I'm here if you need to talk.

I can't open the link.

I am not on medication. This is actually the first time I have openly admitted this. I have been considering going to see a psychologist or counselor but have been to scared. Thanks for the advice.

Oh no, never be scared to get help. There is such a stigma in our society about mental health. Would you get treatment for cancer or diabetes?
So, why not get help for something that is eating away at you emotionally.
My depression caused me to have sever anxiety and panic attacks. That lead to daily migraines and dizziness. I had to stop working.
So, get help ASAP. Screw what others will think about it. It's your well being.

Thank you for the encouragement.

No problem, no one can understand you, unless they have experienced it. So, I'm here if you need to talk.

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