Depressionso

 i am 16 years old. i have been diagnosed with clinical depression for about 3 years. my mother is a cocaine addict, alcoholic and smokes weed. she also has a shop lifting problem. since i was 3 and my parents split up, i have experienced all of this. my mother used to leave her plate of coke, straw and credit card in my room on a dresser. sometimes i would see her doing it and ask her what she was doing and she said her doctor prescribed it to her and that it was allergy medicine and it had a better effect that way. she would leave me in the car a lot when she was going to smoke with her friends and when she was buying or dealing. a number of times i saw her shoplifting but didn't think anything of it at first, then i realized. when i was 13 my mother called me from the police station saying she had been arrested for smoking behind a club. she had then been arrested shortly after for shoplifting from her friends sisters salon. it was in the paper and i was so embarrassed, all my friends and their parents saw it and didn't let their kids come to my house and it was just a horrible time.  my mom had always been drinking and then when i was 13 she got worse. she was always drinking and high and she was mean and yelled. i didn't get along with her from then on. on different occasions she grabbed me by the hood of my sweatshirt and chocked me and she had grabbed my arms. sometimes she told me how she was going to kill herself and then i would be happier. i was miserable for 2 1/2 years. i cut myself, attempted suicide and hated my life. i started staying home all the time from school and slept all day. i stopped eating, and i had horrible headaches. i stayed in my room, didnt go out very much and missed so much school. it was horrible. the worst thing is that my mom continued to be in denial, saying i had behavioral issues. my father didnt know about any of this until one day i called him and said i wanted to live with him, i moved that night. that was 7 months ago. since then i have had an amazing relationship with my father, i have a angel of a step mom and 2 wonderful sisters and a saint of a brother, they have made my life worth living. i love my life now, and i have gotten help and the support i need. my mother is still mad at me, which puts a lot of stress on me, i dont talk to her that much and its still hard. i still am depressed, but my life is looking up.

God is watching over me, and all of us. I turned to him and he answered my prayers.

Never give up, even if it seems like thats the only choice, believe me, im glad i didnt.

:)

xxx

shay43 shay43
18-21, F
3 Responses Mar 17, 2009

Can you imagine the number of people you can help in your life with your life story?<br />
Take it one day at a time and stay straight. I wish I were so smart at your age. <br />
Start doing cognitive therapy now (look online for some exercises) and you will be med-free soon. I think you are wonderful.

Congratulations!!! That is such an inspiring story! I glad you were able to get out of that situation with your Mom,and all those negative influences! What Hell that must have been, but you've passed throught it and survived! Someday i hope your Mom comes to her senses and you can reestablish a relationship with her. If it's to be, it will be.

The beginning of that story was jaw dropping to say the least. That is fantastic that you and your father are now bonding well. Before long you will be put all the BS your mother put you thru behind you!<br />
<br />
My son was in a similar situation but his mother was very manipulative and needy. Once he moved in with me I was able to provide counseling and support, he is a whole new person these days and it's only been a year.