Survived Years of Depression

I think the first time I was depressed was when I was 12 or 13. I always viewed depression as a problem that needed to be fixed. Surely feeling this way wasn't normal and most other people around me didn't seem to have this problem.

Sure, it could be really debilitating at times. Hard to function, communicate etc.

I've watched my child go through depression starting at 12 and I have told him even though he is depressed there is a lot he can accomplish in his life. At least he has me to talk to about this. I had no one at his age.

At my age now, I am very used to depression being a part of my life and it doesn't bother me much anymore. It's part of who I am whether it is a chemical problem or personality defect.

I've been able to graduate from college and have a career despite depression. Depression in the workplace is an interesting topic and I have found that I need to be proactive about depressive tendencies in the workplace.

I know that when I am depressed that at some point it will end. Whatever is going on will change and that I have a  lot of positive things to contribute whether I am depressed or not.

Although I have sought a lot of help for depression at this point I just accept it for what it is. It's not going to change and this is ok for me. It is such a relief not to feel driven to find the next therapist, the next medication etc. A lot of people have been helped by these things but they have been of little help to me.



celestial celestial
46-50, F
5 Responses Jan 31, 2007

Thank you for your views. I have suffered from depression for almost thirty years and I am so sick of it. Just when I think I've got it in the bag, it rears its ugly head again and I can barely get out of bed. I volunteer at a community center, I study martial arts. I know what I am supposed to do to fight it, but it is so exhausting. I kicked the meds they had me on two years ago. It was easier on the meds but after losing hair, gaining weight and having severe side effects, I was worried about what that crap was doing to my liver. On the other hand, when thoughts of ending it all pop back up, what good is a liver?lol In the past year my mother died, my son went off to college and I got layed off from my job. I know this is just as much a period of opportunity as it is one of loss. Sometimes I am just so apathetic I don't have the energy to even think about the rest of my life. When you are all alone what is the point of it all? What a roller coaster. Just wish I was normal. It's a lonely road.

thank you for sharing that, must have been hard going through all of that. I can relate with you though, i feel like im the runt of the family, never getting notiched, and always getting blammed. It's really taking a toll on me to this day 19 years old, and it's all really starting to come together for me the last past couple of years. and im really starting to figure out who I am, reguardless if I have depression or not. one way i get out my anger is taking a nice long drive, or going for a nice long run!

I have had depression on and off for some time. It has diminished now to the point where it is now only a sometimes thing.I don't have a cure but I can tell you what I think has helped me.<br />
1) The practice of Buddhism and meditation.<br />
2) I swim laps daily<br />
3) I cultivate friends that I spend time with on a regular basis.<br />
4) I volunteer my time fixing up homeless shelters, unwed mothers homes and do service things<br />
5) I get out of the house as often as possible.<br />
<br />

I enjoyed your story and it was very motivating. I have been on medication for nine years, I have lost jobs its affected my school, I just cant seem to stick with things I feel hopeless.

thank was useful reading this. My husband is suffering from depression, it's been two months now, but he has experienced it before, of course, as we've been seemingly happy for a few years, it's only now that he has told me about it. It's good to know there are people out there who live with it and can progress. keep the strength.