I've Battled Depression All My Life

I've battled depression since I was 13.   My parents and family doctor just thought that is was the "Moody Teen Syndrome" that affects teenagers, but I knew that what I was going through wasn't just a case of the teenage blahs.  

I wasn't officially diagnosed until I was in my early twenties.   The doctor and I started talking one day about my teen years and when I told her of my suicidal thoughts and that I would hug my friends goodbye on Friday because I didn't know if I was going to be alive on Monday to see them,  she know that what I was going to was serious.   She apologized, but that about all she did for me.   She told me to eat better, exercise and try and think happy thoughts and in a few weeks I would be cured.   Well, I will admit that the eating better and exercising helped a wee bit, but here it is 13 years later and I'm not cured yet.   Depression is not something that is curable in my opinion.   Depression is an illness that you learn to manage and live with.

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3 Responses Sep 9, 2007

Teala, all of you, i feel depression too, secretly, i can fake a very good happyness. I have never known something so overwhelming. My gf, she asks if there is anything she can do, and i just say i can deal with it myself, it will pass, because that is how i usually do it, sometimes i get tired of doing it on my own. . i think suidcidal, i dont think i would react to these feelings, it just doesnt feel nice when these thoughts are with you each day, how are you all feeling today?x

i battle with depression and lots of other things. when i was 9 years old i was put into foster care and moved to home to home and then when i was 12 going on 13 in a few weeks i had a car accident and left me parayled chest down. the doctor told me that i was NEVER going to be able to walk again. i had tears in my eyes i couldn't beleve the doctor but ever since that i dream about and have to deal with my depression everyday. i commited suicide a couple of time but i never went away. i will always be stuck like this until i actually die.

"Smile more! It'll all go away!" I've heard that a few times. It's tough to understand unless you're actually dealing with it.