My Depression

I've been diagnosed with depression for over a year already. It's really bad and i hate it. I have slit wrists, i became addicted to cutting. I get breakdowns alot. I get alot of thoughts about suicide. i would like to add a little to the last thing i said by saying that i've attempted suicide many times before. There was always somebody there to stop me or i just didn't go through with it all. I think ocassionally about what if i disappear from this world, would anybody miss me? or if anyone would care. Well people have told me that i have to go to a phychiatrist/phychologist or however it's spelled but i think i am finally going to listen and go to one for help.

blueberry92 blueberry92
18-21, F
2 Responses Jun 17, 2009

i undersand. i stopped cutting about a year ago, and somtimes it seems so tempting to just pull out my X-acto knife and make the pain go away and come in with the burning cuts on my arms. <br />
I have scars, and to some points, i guess the reason why i cut was because i wanted to know and leave a mark, for future refrense to help me realize that i've lived through a break down. sort of like a pep talk. "i did it once, i can do it again" <br />
So can you. <br />
Despite the fact that you might not feel it; people do care about you alot. theres at least ONE person out there that cares for you more that you'd ever care for yourself. <br />
As part of my experience with cutting, i realized in the end, it was no good. It just leaves ugly scars on your body, even worse yet, i have to live with the fact that i did thoes marks to myself. Which is even uglier still. <br />
But life goes on, and Perhaps a phychiatrist will maybe help you realize that cutting or doing any self destructive actions are definately not the way to go if you want a cure. <br />
You should want to live, life is beautiful despite the fact that it might not seem like it at the moment. <br />
suicide. Why? <br />
Only surviros live to tell the tail. <br />
i speak now, i tell you my story, become a survivor. <br />
What helped me most of all i must admit, was the fact that i had someone there by my side the whole time. <br />
Moral Support through a tough time. <br />
I've got plenty of Support to offer. <br />
If you ever really want to talk about it, im here for you friend. :] <br />
Peace and Love. <br />

hey i understand completley i used to cut and a lot worse i have tried to kill myself many times i almost made it one time but my brother found me a lot of the reason why im like the way i am is because i was abused when i was little by my alcoholic and drug addict father. you dont have to got them but it does help but what really helped me was having ppl to talk to that were like me. So if you ever need to talk you can message me i will always be there to listion