I'm Feeling Depressed Again.. I Really Hate This
I am starting to feel depressed again. I don't want to do anything. I have a small binge.. Everything just sucks. I just want to dissappear..
Why is this happening again? What's wrong with me? I felt good yesterday and this morning. Why did it just change? I want to cry, but I don't want to at the same time. I want to selfharm.. but I can't. And next week I dont have any therapy? How am I going to survive that.
When I feel depressed I just feel suicidal again. And life is so meaningless.. It's so weird. I felt so motivated yesterday. I've written down goals I want to achieve. I really felt like I was goign to be strong and really make it. And now.. the feeling is gone. And I hate this. These lows, these days where I'm feeling depressed, they ruin everything. And my social anxiety is starting to show up again. I feel like I'm not capable to do anything..
I want to tell my parents. But what can they do? Nothing? They can't help me..
****.. I hate this
I can't control it. I can't just be happy or positive again. It's like theres a giant cloud above me. Something really heavy in and on me. It's just.. crappy