My Mom Died.

I'm 15 years old. Very recently, my mom unexpectedly became sick, and died about three weeks later.  I loved my mom so much. My family is one of the closest families you will ever find.  I am left with my dad and 5 year old sister.  I was closest to my mom.  I miss her more than anyone could comprehend.  Its hard to go on and keep moving forward.  Sometimes I don't want to.  I know my God is with me along the way.  There is a lot I do not understand.  I know that the devil took my mom, because God is light and in him is no darkness at all.  After my mom died I got involved with this girl.  She really helped me, and she kept me going.  She broke up with her boyfriend for me.  Now, about two months later, she told me that she is still in love with him.  Her heart is right, she still cares about me very much, but still it hurts so unimaginably bad.  I feel very alone sometimes.  I was in love with her. I still am.  My life was so perfect. I was very thankful.  Now its just hard to keep going. I don't know what I'm going to do.  I am a very strong person.. but I am only human. I'm only 15 years old. This is so hard and it's not fair.  I need some help.  I have a lot of friends, but they can only help so much.  I mean, they really try, but still.  I want this part of my life to be over with, I want to move past it. But its not fair because I'm only fifteen almost 16 and I am supposed to love life.  Sometimes I really truly do.  I have high points and low points.  My low points have gotten pretty low.  Right now is a low point, and I just don't know what to do, where to go, how to get there, or who to go to.  :(

allnamesaretaken allnamesaretaken
18-21, M
2 Responses Feb 9, 2010

I apologize on your loss, it must be hard losing a parent. The only thing I can really say is not to look at your situation as a negative one. Start by not thinking the Devil took your mother. He wouldn't if she was a good person, and that's what she was, correct? Don't mourn her death, celebrate her life and the morals she left behind with you, and most of all honor it by living your life. That's only fair to her, as she is the person who gave you that right.<br />
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Acceptance is the first step. Accept that you can't do anything about it anymore except move on. It's the only thing you really can do.<br />
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I hope for the best.<br />

I ask that you please leave comments. or message me or something. i came to this website, not only to vent (for lack of a better word) but to find people to talk to.