I thought I'd start a group for all those who suffer from existential depression to find some comfort in knowing that you are not alone. For those wondering what it is: http://psychcentral.com/lib/2008/what-is-existential-depression/
I think my existential depression first appeared in my last year of university. I realized that what I had been studying was really of no interest to me. And that I had been living a life that I really didn't want. I dreaded a meaningless 9 to 5 job. I dreaded a life that valued only wealth and status. So I started to ask myself what I really wanted out of life, following the wisdom of Sartre, and came up with a few answers (this process took like 2 years). I guess you could say at this point my existential depression went away, but the garden variety depression was always there, because what I wanted, seemed so difficult to obtain (I also had a bad breakup at the end of university that has left me scarred).
And then emotional trauma, the loss of a loved one. Life is cruel. I've taken it badly. I fall into a deep depression. I quit my job. I go back to school and hide from everyone and everything. 2 years go by. I guess enough time has passed now that once again I feel like I should do something with my life, but my experiences have changed who I am. Now even more things seem meaningless to me. I feel like Camus' Meursault, but I don't want to feel like him. I guess there are still things that have meaning for me (very few), but they seem ever more difficult to obtain give my mental state. I just have so much difficulty doing the 99.9% of the things that have no meaning in order to achieve the 0.1% that do have meaning. That's where I am now, trying to grind through the meaninglessness to obtain meaning.
Anyways I hope that sharing my story will inspire others to so as well, and maybe this group can be a place where we can help each other through the meaningless aspects of life. Thanks.