My Name Is Josh. I Am Alone.

I always used to wonder how most of the people around me were happy with their lives. how they could do what they did and how they all went about their lives without giving much thought to what they are doing and why. Yes.. I was alone. Loneliness has been with me ever since I was a child. My parents died in a car crash when I was ten years old. The pain still feels new at times. Growing up in a foster home was not easy for me. I could never fit in with the family. They stopped trying to make me feel at home after a while. I got out of the house as soon as I turned 18. I was not popular in high school.. or anywhere else. People just never seemed to notice me.. It was as if I was always invisible.

I was hopeful when I started going to college. I was hopeful that I would make friends and have a life at last. Then I met her.. Her name is Selena. Surprisingly enough, we hit it off and I was dating her before I knew it. She was a foreign student. She had come here from Spain. She had such long beautiful black hair. I never got tired of just being in her presence.

But just as soon as it started, it ended too. She was taken away from me. She was in a car accident. She's not the same Selena anymore. She changed... She hates me now for reasons unknown to me. For reasons I cannot explain. It is then that the dark truth finally struck me. I am, as always, alone... again. I am writing my story here to vent out some of this pain. It hurts so bad I can abrely feel it anymore.