Need Action...words Are Not Enough! – Part 2

The Holidays are now over and I feel lost in my own mind. I don’t know what decision is best for me and my son. I love my husband beyond words, our 10 year wedding anniversary is in a month and a half and I am not sure we are going to make it to then. I had an amazing holiday but I still feel that he is not 100% over the woman from the affair. I know he still talks to her; someone saw them together not too long ago. He walked out of counseling last month because the affair was brought up in conversation. He apologized for walking out but said he can not continue to talk about that topic. Is he feeling guilty? Well he should!!! And I have a right to still have feelings about the betrayal. It does not mean I love him any less, just that I am still a bit raw on the inside.
I asked him if he would go back to counseling and he does not see the need for it if the affair keeps coming up. I feel that we can benefit from learning how to better communicate. Our counselor said that statically the betrayed person take up to 2 years to heal and move on. We are just coming to a year in March. I don’t know what to do. I am tired to the non-arguments, ignoring feelings and confused as to what he wants with his life. If he does not want to be married then move on, if he wants to remain married then man up...end all contact and help make it work.
My Wish is that he can be 100% honest with himself and decide what he wants because he cannot have his cake and eat it too!
smurphette smurphette
31-35, F
Jan 13, 2013