So Loud, They Deafen

You said you were my friend.
You said you were the friend I've needed, all this time.
You said you were the friend who would be there for me.
You said you wouldn't leave me Alone.
You said you understood.
You said you would listen.
You said you'd put your feelings for me aside.
You said OF COURSE you'd still be my friend if I someday dated someone who wasn't you.
You said you loved me.
You SAID a lot of bullshit.
You said you were my friend.

But your actions..... Oh, Jesus is weeping, you self-righteous pile of steaming pig ****. He's weeping that you call yourself his. He's weeping that so many people failed to see his simple message: LOVE ONE ANOTHER AS YOURSELF. You don't want to live by those words, fine, but don't taint his name.

You abandoned me. Deliberately.
You abandoned me in my need to get drunk with work friends. And again the next day because you didn't feel like it.
You refused to even see me for 15 minutes to help me with another need. KNOWING that by not doing so, I would not be eating, sleeping, or wanting to live.
You deliberately abandoned me, knowing my pain had reached suicidal levels. You SAID you'd NEVER do that. You SAID that you were sanctuary.
Again. You SAID a lot of bullshit.

You have broken EVERY promise you made me.
You PROMISED to still be here, even if I one day DID date someone, and it wasn't you. So where are you, you ****? Not. *******. Here. *******.
And then, after every other skimy ****** up thing, you had the audacity - AUDACITY - to BLAME ME!!! To put everything on ME and traits that you PROMISED (and promised MULTIPLE times) that you would NEVER hold against me.

Your actions have revealed you to be the singular, most despicable excuse of a human being that I have ever known - INCLUDING the skeazoid who raped me that you've betrayed me over - due to the terrifying levels of deceit and selfishness that you have lowered yourself to.

You say you're a follower of Jesus, but in your dealings with me, you have been Satan's *****. I would have been better off sleeping on the streets of Phoenix than accepting your offer of Sanctuary. If I ever figure out time shifting, I WILL rectify that, next time.

You have revealed yourself thoroughly unworthy of not just my friendship, but warm blooded companionship in general.

SunshineEddy SunshineEddy
31-35, F
Jan 13, 2013