I Believe In Astrology

Your ****** Horoscope

By: CopperCoil

Written on February 10th, 2013

Aries - Selfish *****

Taurus - Stubborn *******

Gemini - Annoying Attention-*****

Cancer - Moody Jerk

Leo - Egotistical Douchebag

Virgo - Neurotic *****

Libra - Flaky Derelict

Scorpio - Obsessive ****

Sagittarius - Awkward Fucktard

Capricorn -Greedy Emo

Aquarius - Perverted Psychopath

Pisces - Whiny Bimbo

(Did not write this as I was too busy staring in the mirror)

By: CopperCoil

Age: 36-40 , Male

331 people have read this story

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50 responses

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LuckyBird

Oh great. I was born on the Aries/Pisces cusp. FML...

May 27
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  CopperCoil
  Lol
  
  May 27
  1 like
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MyNameIsHurl

Bullshit.

May 27
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OdiumIncantatum

*pouts* I'm not an egotistical douchebag..... I'm only slightly self-centered with a hint of douchebagginess. Now if you will excuse me, I have people to grace with my awesomeness.

May 26
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Januarysnow

Hahaha! ! This is awesome! I happen to be a perverted psycopath, with awkward fucktard rising. But, my Venus is in whiny bimbo,.....so that's a plus.

May 25
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  CopperCoil
  Haha.. I totally forgot i was a annoying attention ***** rising and a moody jerk moon. Explains a lot. Thanks for reminding me there is so much more to me than just being anegotistical douche.
  
  May 26
  1 like
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Oceanhiker

Egotistical Douch......? Fu@kin A straight! And then some....

May 6
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blingblogbloop

LOL NO!!! How dare you name me a greedy emo!!! Why not the *******....

Mar 31
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  CopperCoil
  i love greedy emos!!!! they work perfectly with egotistical douchebags such as myself :D
  
  Apr 1
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damselfly

OMG! So that's why I'm the way I am!

Mar 23
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permafrost21

Guess I should have been Aquarius lol

Mar 23
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KatarinaVonSweet

level wise do you really think greedy emos are a bad as perverted psychopaths.....? i think that seems a little harsh on aquarians

Mar 15
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  CopperCoil
  All I know for sure is none of them are as good as being an egotistical douchebag!
  
  Mar 15
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  KatarinaVonSweet
  i dont even know what a douchebag is! but I bet its very jolly.... i'm rather enjoying being a fucktard...just saying it makes me laugh
  
  Mar 16
  1 like
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Dragon56

Stubborn *******......hmmm, not the first time I've been called that! ;)

Mar 13
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JoeyPFoxx

WHY DOES EVERYONE ALWAYS CALL ME AN ATTENTION *****? I THINK IT SUCKS THAT JUST BECAUSE I WAS BORN ON A PARTICULAR DAY OF A PARTICULAR YEAR THAT SOMEHOW THAT MAKES ME AN ATTENTION *****. I MEAN REALLY? WHAT'S UP WITH THAT? AND WHO REALLY CARES ABOUT WHO THE NEXT POPE IS? AND, WHAT'S WITH ALL THE GREEN TECHNOLOGY ****? WE ALL KNOW IT'S JUST THE MAN TRYING TO TAKE MY GUNS AWAY.

Mar 13
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  CopperCoil
  AFUCKINGMEN!
  
  Mar 13
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  CountryAngel69
  Giggles
  
  Mar 13
  1 like
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laynemeyer

Describes me perfectly!

Mar 13
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Krapsparov

hey, how did they know I was a moody jerk? :o I loved them! now, they can go **** themselves! :P

Mar 9
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Acrimonyx

Obsessive ***** here.

Mar 8
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  Acrimonyx
  *****
  o.O
  
  Mar 8
  1 like
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DancingFox

Virgo - Neurotic *****. lol. So true.

Mar 8
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americanwitch

That is amazingly accurate!

Mar 4
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bcvegas4u

Picking a negative trait & assign it to a sign works just as well as picking a complementary trait & tagging it to a sign. EVERYTHING has pros & cons.

Feb 16
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muskats

do you do natal charts?

Feb 16
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Experienced321

Should we call this a whoroscope, with a ouiji board....

Feb 12
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goliathtree

This can't possibly be correct. It is not possible to have multiple horoscope signs, let alone all of them.

Feb 12
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  goodlittlegirl
  You made me laugh GT =)
  
  Feb 12
  1 like
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Kathryn1985

Dripping acid this morning? Suggest when you need to satisfy your hunger with last week's "Rico's Taco's" at three in the morning you learn the definition of the word, "rancid".

Feb 12
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CountryAngel69

LOL.

Feb 10
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LaSonnambula1

LOL ... this is very refreshing! I'm tired of pandering astrologists blowing smoke up my bottom!

Feb 10
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  Acrimonyx
  Your comment made me lol
  
  Mar 8
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  LaSonnambula1
  It's true! It's just like fortune cookies. Have you ever seen a negative fortune cookie? Maybe Coppy should write some more realistic fortunes and sell them to the fortune cookie companies!
  
  Mar 11
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affinityterra

I can attest to the Capricorn being true...married to a greedy emo...*giggles*

Feb 10
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Caramelicious

LOL well This Whiny Bimbo has to say what?! :-p

Feb 10
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Illiteratetroll

I can see you are a Leo then.

Feb 10
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  CopperCoil
  You say something? I was too busy admiring my own thoughts of how great I am.
  
  Feb 10
  1 like
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DenteAvvelenato

******* love this

Feb 10
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goodlittlegirl

This Whiny Bimbo just fell off the couch with laughter. God I needed that Coppy thanks.

Feb 10
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  affinityterra
  Would much rather be in the bimbo category than the neurotic ***** category..haha.
  
  Feb 10
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  Caramelicious
  LOL Terra you're not neurotic just eccentric!
  
  Feb 10
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affinityterra

Loved this! So funny. I guess I'm a neurotic ***** then....lol. And I've got lots Awkward fucktard and egotistical douchebag in my chart too. No wonder I'm so ****** up.

Feb 10
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  Caramelicious
  LOL
  
  Feb 10
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  ineedadrink
  Let me take notes here for future reference and research.
  
  Feb 10
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  affinityterra
  I happen to have a fondness for awkward fucktards ;-)
  
  Feb 10
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  ineedadrink
  They got it pretty much right, lol.
  
  Feb 10
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  affinityterra
  I'm in denial, like caramelicious wrote, I'm eccentric, not neurotic.
  
  Feb 10
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  ineedadrink
  Meant about me. :-)~
  
  Feb 10
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  affinityterra
  yes, got that :-).....awkward, but not a fucktard.
  
  Feb 10
  1 like
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