Soulmate!!!

i have been always believing in love since i was 6. i thought love is every thing, love is the air to breathe, love is the best thing we can ever have, but i didn't understand it. awhile later i figured out that it's not only about love itself, it's also about  "the one" that you know you're meant to be together when you look in his/her eyes, your soulmate. the idea that GOD has made each one of us with a missing half that he/she will be so lucky to find them in their life time.

what supported my beliefs is the story of Adam&Eve, they made me believe even more, and they also killed the idea that anyone can live alone and a guy is not what my life has to be all about. Adam lived in the heaven but he felt that there's something missing, there's still a need, and that's why GOD gave him Eve, what about us living in a crazy world like that, can we feel full without our other half!!! noway no matter how we try to convince ourselves. Adam and Eve were made for each other, From each other... and that's what i believe. i believe that i will be having my Adam oneday, not only having love..

i do believe in love more that anything else but i have one problem!!!! I HAVE NEVER BEEN IN LOVE :s:s:s

i don't know how love feels, i'm surrounded by a lot of fears that made it very complicated for me to get into any relationship since i never feel so strong and i believe that this thing i will be having, either to be so special or let it be nothing.. i sometimes say i just didn't find the one that made me feel secure enough or even in love enough to be with!!! but will i ever find him???? is the real question here.

i've been always searching, analysing, following my heart, and getting nothing in the end. i tried not to regret it cause it was my decision after all. all i thought about is that "i'm just saving myself for the right person." but i'm too afraid i'll never find him.

yes i admit it that this time i find way different than any time before... this time i saw signs, this time i believed, this time i'm not rushed, this time i know i really want it, but "what if?" is getting me a very bad headache!!! i can't stop thinking and this one of the things that happens to me for the first time.
- what if he doesn't feel this way?
-what if he's getting closer because it's obvious that i like him?
-what if we became together and i get hurt?
-what if he's just having fun?
-what if i tell him later "sorry i can't fall in love with you"? ( as every time before)

it's absolutly the first time i have a lot of fears like that, think a lot like that. i'm afraid, and i want it to happen. i always think about backing off, letting it go for God sake, i just can't take it... and what is really killing that till now nothing is obvious, neither his feelings nor mine. all i know is that it's the first time i got all these feelings and confusions in such a short time.
RehamGhorayeb RehamGhorayeb
18-21, F
2 Responses Jul 12, 2010

It is okay to feel afraid , but do not let your fear comes big enough to live the moment , I mean to drop those what ifs ,life is ups and downs , so live your life and start the love .

I agree with you on that, I felt like you, RehamGhorayeb, for a very long time. But now, I have found my soulmate, and he is my light that chased away all of my shadows, I love him very much. And he loves me. So, just keep positive about it, and you will eventually find someone. That is the way it was with me, it took me a while to find him.