Twisted Reincarnation

One day, out of the blue, my oldest brother spoke with me about an incident that occurred when he was 12 years old. He called it his worst childhood memory. After he told me, his wife informed me that in their 28 year marriage (up to that point), that was the only time my brother had ever spoken of his childhood. The strange part is I remember the incident. I was present when it occurred. I was there with my brother, my father and my mother. My brother did not remember I was there. I sat in mute silence because I was only 6 years old, and also because I was stunned by what I had witnessed. I am still stunned by it to this day and have never forgotten the incident. I am stunned that parents, especially my own parents, could be so cruel to their own children, but then I am reminded of this fact whenever I take my aging mother out for lunch. She will often refer to us, her children, as "our children", using the term in an odd way. She will insert it into a sentence like this: "You know, your father and I were very disappointed with our children", when she is speaking directly to me, when I am the only person present other than herself. She would sometimes say this when my father was sitting next to her, but he never corrected or contradicted her. In an instant, I thought my parents were trying to tell me I was adopted, which, at that point in my life, wouldn't have seemed like such a bad thing. Living with my parents was very odd and love was a conditional substance.

A memory came back to me just a few days ago while I was reading Carol Bowman's book about children and reincarnation. I remembered a deep memory that I had forgotten, or probably its more accurate to say, it was a memory I had shoved deep into the recesses of my mind, a long time ago in hopes that I would forget all about it. It was triggered by reading a story from her first book. It sent a shock wave through my mind and body as I realized the implications and impact it must have had on me at the time. It was the day my mother told me that she did not love me. She told me she loved a friend of mine as her son more than she loved me. She went on to explain to me that this friend of mine was her son in a previous life, as if that somehow justified her comment. She never explained it further than that. She didn't seem to grasp that I was her son in this life, which is all that really should have mattered, and that she also had two other sons as well. Where did they fit in? Given that my mother's mother was a psychic medium, and that we were brought up to understand reincarnation, karma, and a whole lot more from an early age, I am at a loss for words to describe the stupidity exhibited by my mother. Many times she not only demonstrated her lack of compassion, but also her total lack of understanding of what she had taught us as growing children. I never felt she actually connected with her children in any real meaning way.

The only lesson I can take from this is: even if you believe in reincarnation, and feel enlightened by it, it doesn't mean you are an enlightened or rational human being. Reincarnation is just a piece of the puzzle; its not life itself. It also showed me that my mother was twisted. What would possess someone to tell their child something like that? Nothing good can ever come from making that sort of statement. What on earth was she thinking?

PastPilot PastPilot
51-55, M
10 Responses Nov 11, 2011

Yep, Weird mum syndrome here too, but perhaps there is a more earthly reason, she had perhaps difficulty in breast feeding and getting that vital surge of oxytocin that a mother needs to properly bond with her babes, my mum had a bad time with me, being three weeks premature, stuffed in an incubator and sent home from miles away, also she was an unmarried mother in 1960, so she rejected the whole shebang...I was in foster care for 4 months till she was persuaded to retrieve me in the nick of time before the fosterer's got to sign for me permanently...but she couldn't keep it up, and my Nana brought me up, mainly, with her coming and going to work, and new relationship blossoming, half brother arrival which she adored,,,I got a job in social work and just before she died was able to explain this to her, about the lack of sympathy from the medical profession at the time, and she was so grateful I'd 'let her off the hook' me adult, her child,,,,it was something I felt at age 14...perhaps you have too,, with the folks,,,J

I Love Being Caned Because Of Past Lives

My *** Was Made For Sitting On And Getting Whacked.

My minister of spiritualist religion--they all do past life readings--says that i was in one incarnation a secretary to the big Roman General in Roman Britain.
I have a lot of past life experience sitting on my ***.

I was also in the Roman cavalry in what is now Holland many years later, and nothing much of anything ever happened.

In my most recent past life (1900-1917) i was a British Army Tommy and was shot dead in WW1 by machine gun bullets.
The whole bunch of my unit was killed, and i've never had a past life in which i really engaged in hand to hand combat.
I dare say i got caned plenty as a child in that life.

I always did well in Latin and people say i have a Latinate way of speaking and writing. But my grades weren't perfect.

My *** was made for sitting on and getting whacked. Perhaps that's why i like woman spanking me.

One or more of you ladies out there in EP land should cane me for my imperfect Latin since it was the language i spoke in everyday life in more
than one life.

I don't much want to be re-incarnated but apparently my next life will be as a grade
school teacher.

My past lives were dull and banal, and now i know why i am glad of that.

Are you for real?

Most lives are boring and uneventful. Not much happens, other than living a sedentary life. I have many friends who work, come home, watch TV, go to sleep and then awake to go back to work. That is their life. Nothing much happens, but it still happens for a reason. Some lives are meant to be a contrast, or a respite, of a previous life where a soul may have had a particularly hard life or a series of hard lives. Nothing is wasted, however. All lives hold learning potential.

I have memories being a British Tommy as well. A junior officer. I have several memories in fact from this life. My unit was a border regiment. I remember being in a hospital recovering from a shrapnel wound in my left arm (I had a similar injury in this life as well -- I always wonder if such things repeat?). A minor injury that got me off the front lines in April 1917 for a month. I never did engage in hand-to-hand combat either. Oddly enough, such actions were very rare in WWI. Deaths were mostly from artillery (98%), then followed by machine gun fire (direct and indirect), and then by small arms fire. I was killed by the latter after our position was overrun by the German counter attack at Cambrai on November 30th, 1917. I was killed on the first day just after their attack began. My company broke and ran to the rear. Funny that I can sometimes still feel the wound that was inflicted on my upper right leg in this life at the time of my death.

I only have one memory of the Roman period and I was a priest, although I have a keen interest in the Roman Navy, which was really officered by Greeks as the Greek were hired by the Romans due to their experience and expertise at sea. I have no idea if I was a Roman citizen or a volunteer axillary, or what. Still, the life of a Roman sailor/marine intrigues me.

I do not have memories of being punished or disciplined from any lifetime. What memories I have of past childhoods have been good, but that doesn\'t mean they weren\'t hard lives. Punishment is not a theme that runs in my lives or in my present life. However, if you look at the life of a soldier, I suspect the average soldier spends a lot of time sitting around on his *** waiting for something to happen. Strangely, though, many of my past lives I remember are punctuated with action, terror and combat. A lot happened. I would not say my lives were mundane and sitting around. I did a lot of traveling, to exotic locations in the world, and was in important places at the right time. In my present life, I am far more sedentary. I feel that I have done enough traveling in my past lives. This is the first life I have had in a long time where I have been able to live near where I was born. That actually means a lot to me, although recently, I feel a pull to get out and explore the regions of my past lives. I may just pick up soon and do some traveling, but without a rifle in my hand or an army at my back.

Being caned in your life could be a repeat memory or theme. What it may mean, or what you are to do about it, I cannot say. Some people are drawn heavily to sex, almost an addiction, and this can be a running theme from lifetime to lifetime. There as many answers as there are people in the world. However, it is something you can work on. Meditating on it, or simply asking a psychic may yield answers. What I have done over the last 6 years is to ask not one, but several psychics the same question about my past lives. You\'d be surprised at how many times I have received the exact same information from as many as 8 different psychics. I keep getting told the same information, which defies the odds of just guessing. It can\'t hurt to try. You may learn more about yourself, if you are willing to ask and look.

I have been told that i deliberately chose before i was born to have an alcoholic father, a scatter brained mother, and a brother who hated me.

I am here to \"tough it out.\"

I have been also told that the rottener the life the more you learn from it.

The same was not said of my pop-goes-the-weasel in and out hospital visits, but then again this has been completely sprung on me.

This is the truth, the cold truth, as cold as the steel they keep using to clean my foot out.

For the most part, we choose the lives we live. This is often hard to understand, but the life you are handed depends on what you planned to experience. The choice was yours before you were born. Not all we experience are suppose to be good. Many of the experiences we need to understand are hard lessons. We have all gone through tough and easy lives. Strangely, the lives in which we progress the most are often the hardest as the empathy we gain is deeper.

Back in 1986 worked for a publishing house. Back then, it was a good crew of people who worked there, for the most part. We were working to get a book out, but it took four months to get this one book ready and back from the printer. It was delivered to us around 2pm on the 23rd of December. Since most industrial shops closed on the 24th for Christmas, it was accomplished with just 3 hours to spare. When we were told a truck carrying our new book had arrived in our loading dock, we all had to go outside to help unload it. That took five of us about three hours to accomplish, and stacking the boxes of books onto the shelves in our warehouse. I stood next to my boss after we just finished. as he spoke with the editor and the salesman. I was tired and taking a bit of a break. While I stood there, my glance went to my boss who was about 4 feet from me. A profound understanding suddenly came over me. It was almost like a voice was speaking to me, but it was more like an understanding, or having a conversation inserted into your mind. The message was very clear: \"Your boss was once your father in another lifetime. In that life you abandoned your father and family to go off to fight in a war. You really should have stayed home because your father needed you to help work the farm. In this life today, you need to repay him by working for him. He still needs your help. You will know when it is time to go and move on\".

Often, this is how our lives work. We make promises and plans before we are born. These plans and promises often involve other souls, so changing course in your life can effect others who are relying on you. Without your participation, they cannot fulfill their promises and commitments. However, this sort of thing happens all the time. Its not a big thing. Freedom of choice will change not only the course of our lives, but the lives of others too. Food for thought. Having an alcoholic father, a scattered brained mother and a brother who hates you is not that uncommon. You are almost describing my family, except my father did not drink. Setting yourself up to experience such things is par for the course and is probably as common as mud. However, living through it can be a nightmare. If you had problems with such an experiences in a lifetime, where you did not go through with it for whatever reason, you may still be bound to do it again. Abandoning a life goal often means we will have to, at some point, come back to the problem and try again. This is not seen as a bad thing, nor is it seen as punishment, but rather it is more a marker that shows us where we need to grow. You being here to \"tough it out\" shows that you are on the right path, despite it having been a difficult path.

With our lives, despite what we may be here to experience, there are usually major experiences we have planned to experience, but also many more minor events. We usually have five or six major events planned in a lifetime. Sometimes a major event may occur, such as being seriously injured, that may involve long hospital stays, but the lesson being worked on may be more for those who need to help you. Giving those around you the experience of helping you is an act of love. It is just as important to receive as it is to give. Often people have a harder time receiving than giving. One angle is: receiving allows others to repay you. Its your gift to them. Being inured and having others help you is a sort of sacrifice for others. But like in all lives, the experiences learned and expected are as diverse as the number of people on the planet. There is never one blanket answer to anything.

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Some people don't want to face the truth and thats there own reflection in the mirror

<p>I'm sorry for the way your mother treated u. I don't believe we choose our life down here. I believe we are put here by reasons that defy the power of choice. Who would want to experience such unloved environments again and again only to find out what love is and isn't. That defies our right to experience lives with the intention of maturing in knowledge about our real selves not in body form but in energy form. We were created by 2 DNAs. We have a rectilien part in the back of the brain as reptiles do. The other part is our humanoid form. I've asked doctors if this was true and they confirmed it. Ask yours as well. I know that there's more answers to these questions but we definitely won't get them from any government. I do believe that we are the experiments of other alien civilizations in which they choose where we go for their amusement to see how we evolve where they haven't. I have found that we r very powerful. But we have to get to know who and what we r to realize that we r the ones who r in control, not them. I believe that many of the alien visits is to frighten people but also to do DNA testing to see how our body and mind has evolved. We hear so many abduction cases and look at the real life movie in Nome, Alaska where documented cases were caught on tape. So we all have to face the fact that we r the aliens planted here on this planet.</p>

That was pretty screwed up of your mom to say, maybe when she dies she'll be reincarnated into a cockroach and stepped on.

<p>I always believed that we choose our parents prior to reincarnation and we have a good reason for it which we do not remember once reincarnated.You could have come back in that family to take care of someone you had karma with,you could find the answers through your dreams,or while meditating and sometimes the answers come spontaneously.Or your parents could have had karma with you they needed to sort out and you decided to give them a chance.Sadly sometimes it does not always work out for the best in this physical dimension.</p>

I suspect it was the later, my parents had karma to pay off, or, we just made an agreement for this life where they would play the part of my parents without karma being involved. I was told my parents didn't follow through with our agreement and basically threw the agreement away, leaving me in the lurch, so to speak. However, last February, I was told by a psychic that my mother would help me out financially soon and the reason for this help was to make up for messing up my childhood. The psychic was correct. Two months later, my mother did help me out financially. The psychic stated that my mother would not let on why she helped me out, but I had already been told by the why by the psychic. I suspect that either consciously or subconsciously, my mother knew she had messed up in this life. Still, I harbor no real ill feelings, but it reminds me that even with the best made plans and intentions, things can still go wrong when it comes to freedom of will. Thinking more about it, it gives me an insight into the makings of life experience from a different perspective. It is still a valuable experience.

I believe they call it 'Character Building', & it does have that effect..I recently described myself, as a Crumbling Chateau..not built for defence, but solid enough to weather what comes....

I read your war grenadier dream first and then your enima story. I wasn't going to say anything, but. then I read this story and damn i cant believe the doctor would do you like that. If there is standard procedure to be done, least be honest about it.

To bad we don't get to choose our parents. I also grew up in a household that was not demonsttive with affection or praise. Maybe next time you will be the parent and you can show your mother what it is to be a wanted loved and cherished child. mini

It is my firm belief that ALL children should know what it means to be loved, safe and not know hunger. Every child deserves a blanket of his own and know what it feels like to sleep in a warm bed at night. We all know that in reality that doesn't occur but that would be something I would change if I had a wish to be granted

PastPilot,<br />
I know how you feel. My mother did not love me, but she didn't have to tell me, she showed it every day of my life. I was the youngest of four, and she did tell me more than once, that she only wanted three children. She was mentally ill, and even though no one knew but me, she died of Alzheimer's at the age of 73. I felt like she deserved it for the way she treated me. <br />

I have read many cases like this, from various book on reincarnation. It is easy for a child to pick up on how their parents really feel about them. I find it very difficult to grasp why someone would treat their child this way. There are lessons to learn and experience, and we accept those lessons before we are born, but there is a small percentage who gets these lessons thrust upon them without asking. Still... we must rise above it regardless, or do the best we can to try.

I actually think that our generation discovered a new set of neuroses, as the 50's 60's & 70's drove our parents to new freedoms, they were ill equipped to rationalise, or to foresee what consequences it would have on our generation.Those who grasped the new, were pioneers of modern day life, and yes they got some of it wrong,and they had no idea how far to take it...but they had baby boom income, and opportunity which our generation can only dream of...overall, we shirt tailed onto a lot of good stuff.

Sometimes it's a physical illness, like lack of Oxcytocin, that causes the feelings of distance between parent and child, these days we understand, and give Oxcyticin therapy to distressed mothers, back then they had no idea what caused some mothers to reject their babes, they used to do electrical shock therapy on loads of them,,,Get help from a professional to get a grip of what she was going through, and by that, you will eventually be able to forgive her, as I did mine, it's a great weight from your shoulders, when it happens, and love trickles slowly in,,J

Look up the psychology of motherhood, she will most likely have fallen between the cracks, of 60's medicine, they were very hard on women in those days, and often traumatised the mothers so badly they did not recover, to bond with their babies..

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