Fragmented I Think
OK..I have come to the end of my tether trying to find help from others and myself. Since I was 6 years old I have been almost obsessed with the 1940s and 1950s, a certain city during that era and certain people of that era. I have found that my life has run almost exact parallel to a person from that era, whom will remain nameless here. I look at pictures of this city from that era and feel so warm and comfortable. I listen to music and do my makeup like that era. I have memories from that era that are not mine or are they just fantasy? I have become depressed, melancholy/homesick and know that when I die I will be able to go back. I often wonder if I am delusional...words cannot express the agony I have felt over this. I often feel like I am outside of myself..like I am not me but someone else.