There Is Unconditional Love, You Have To Feel It Yourself In Order To Believe In It.
Unconditional love is not something everyone would see at any corner. Even when you look at what you think to be "the best couple you have ever seen". It is really love without conditions and limitations. But, according to my experience, this feeling has become known, or better said has been taught to me by only my own....experience, by me not being loved unconditionally, by me struggling to understand what might not be functioning, why in spite of what the partner does, deep in side I don't feel secure that it is pure love going on between the two of us. For me, i kind of studied unconditional love on my own feelings and how I felt when the partner tried to impose conditions on me. This is the whole point, as I see it: if you want to be loved as you are, with the features of personality that others may not see as acceptable to them and yet to be loved by the partner, with a complete freedom to choose what your soul urges without being put restrictions or emotionally threatened to stop doing something because the partner gets hurt by your freedom, if you really want to be accepted to just be.... the ONLY solution is that YOU GIVE THE PARTNER WHAT YOU REALLY WANT FOR YOURSELF. How can you want unconditional love, if you yourself have expectations, judgments, things that you take close to heart not because they are bad, but because you have certain expectations against it... How can you want to be unconditionally loved, if you, deep inside still keep on expecting something or setting "spoken out" or "inner hidden" conditions on your partner. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE starts first with you having it in yourself, with you giving it, with you INCLUDING yourself in unconditional love for your own being. When you experience what conditional love is, how much expectations and fears cost you and hurt you, when you understand in essence that many of the reasons of your being hurt/frustrated in a relationship is that you mostly expect and love the partner conditionally , then you can start learning how to love unconditionally by exercising the freedom to choose you would like for yourself, the unconditional love you would like for yourself. Of course, this doesn't mean you must stay in a relationship that harms your integrity, where you are not respected as person etc. but such relationship should not be a reason for you to withdraw your unconditional love for the partner. You may split because you have two different paths , but the love would still be there, you simply decide to go on. This is what unconditional love means for me.