Let Yourself Be The Reason

I’m a firm believer that people do come into your life for a reason. I look at this in a broader spectrum and not simply from a religious point of view. There are times when we feel we don’t need interactions with others in order to fulfil our lives, but we really do need each other in order to promote personal growth. Life throws so much in our paths and at times we are so weak it seems we cannot overcome it. People do come with complications, but it’s up to us as individuals to learn how to prioritize and to stop wasting energy on complicating our own lives. Through our day to day interactions with those around us we learn so much more and we grow so much faster. With every disappointment, betrayal and heart break a vital life lesson is learnt. Every love, laugh and gratitude brings happiness and faith. These are integral experiences without which we cannot build our lives and embark on the journey of becoming. Regardless of what we have yet to become.


I had a difficult childhood and throughout my pre-teens and teenage years, I tried to keep to myself as much as possible. Healthy relationships, whether romantic or otherwise, were foreign to me. Everyone kept hurting and disappointing me, so I was convinced that if I remained withdrawn and isolated then I’d be just fine. It was always so much better in my head. I needed nothing and no one, but me. I soon realised that I was killing myself. Crushing the sprout that was forcing through the gravel inside me. I felt numb and oblivious to those around me who tried to crack my armoured exterior. And then came life. I was 18, had my first post-high school job and finally stopped hiding in my morbid and lonely shell. I finally began to feel something real! Made friends who betrayed me, got hurt and recovered. Had my first sweaty palms, butterflies in tummy, tongue twisting crush. Made so many good and bad memories. It was all worth it.


Since I opened myself up to the possibility of close relationships with people, I’ve become uncontrollably empathic to the point where I tend to think with my heart and not my head. I sometimes get so involved in my friends’ lives that I eventually upset myself in the process. That still bothers me, but I’m working on finding the right balance. By keeping an open and logical mind whilst getting involved in/ observing the lives of others has helped me learn from their mistakes. By allowing other people into my life I’ve learnt so much about people, life in general and myself. If I remained the way that I was then I would never have grown into the person I am today. I'm still growing, still learning and I realise I have a long and rocky road ahead. I welcome it! It's all part of life's enduring chain.


People do come into our lives with a purpose. Sometimes a very small yet evident one and sometimes an elusive, yet eventually life changingly significant one. They don’t always realise their purpose and most of the time we fail to see it too. It usually reveals itself in retrospect. Amongst so many other things, this is roughly what I’d learnt from the following experiences. My first girlfriend taught me the beauty of being myself and enjoying my youth. My first boyfriend was a reality check for me. After he terminated our relationship I realised how I suffocated him and that I was doing all the taking and none of the giving. Losing one of my best friends taught me to be careful who I trust and to never allow others to control my emotions. My last boyfriend taught me the value of happiness and romantic relationships regardless of whether it’s permanent or only temporary. He also taught me to face my fears, have fun and take risks. So even though the above mentioned people caused me pain and are no longer apart of my life, I embrace the experiences and memories they brought into my life. They all participated and left their mark in a way for which I will eternally be grateful.


Value every interaction with every person in your life. Life is so short and time is not our own. You only have one opportunity to live this life. Live it!






Dariah Dariah
22-25, F
Mar 10, 2010