Those Moments Are On My Mind

I met this guy a month ago. We were at the same party. He was so my type and he noticed me looking at him. He then approached me and we had a great time partying, kissing, and dancing. We watched the sunrise together, had great romantic moments. He also met my friends and next day we spent time on the beach.

From there he started getting closer and closer, texting me and calling me every day. I enjoyed him and his presence when we went out. But I am at a great place right now in my life and I don't want to get into a relationship. It is summer, I have a great job, a lot of friends, self confidence, I am going out a lot, partying, meeting new people. I have nothing holding me back. I am completely free and I want to keep it that way, unless, of course, I meet that very very very special guy, which he is not.

I made that clear to him and he accepted, however he kept surrounding me every time we met, even if I was with my friends. Ok, ok, I enjoyed the attention, but to me the boundaries were clear, until....

Well until I fell for his seduction last weekend and slept with him. He seduced me and I wanted to be seduced. We had sex and this changed things. He is back calling me and texting me often. I still don't want a relationship but I catch myself remembering over and over the love-making moments, how he touched me, kissed me, ****** me, his hands and mouth all over me. And I feel desire, I want it again. It is mixed with warm feelings, in-love feelings, although I know I am not in love.

I guess, unless the sex is bad, it can mess up with our feelings, create new ones and make us feel attached. Very smart this mother nature!

To be honest, I don't even know how to handle this right now. If I dive in deep, I may end up falling in love because of sex. And this is the last thing I want right now.

thinkandfeel thinkandfeel
36-40, F
Aug 2, 2010