A Surprise For The Loveless

It's crazy how things turn out so differently than you imagine them too. I always thought me and my high school crush would be together forever because he was just so much like me, but I never knew the extremes of his personality and we broke up over something ridiculously petty. I was so head over heels for this guy, but his mind wasn't set on what I was trying to give to him and I ended up with my heart in my hands, bruised but not yet broken, so I decided then that I was tired of being hurt and that I wouldn't love anyone anymore because the pain just wasn't worth it. I'd began a trip down a dark and loveless path and then an old friend of mine had returned to the city on leave from the Army. Me and this friend didn't necessarily have a romantic history, we didn't even have a sexual one, but we had a history. He told me that he wanted to see me and I didn't have anything better to do, besides I thought it would be nice to see him again so I met up with him a little while after his plane touched down. When I saw him I knew something was different, but I couldn't really put my finger on it. When he hugged me I felt something inside of me shift gears and I kind of pulled back and looked at him and he kissed me. At first I was going to pull away and tell him about himself, but I couldn't bring myself to move. The urgency in his kiss scared the hell out of me and I wasn't sure what to do. It had been an entire year since me and the high school crush had broken up and I had stuck to my word and strayed away from anything too serious. I wasn't sure if I should run from him too but he didn't give me the chance. He pulled back and apologized admitting that he'd was wrong to kiss me like that, and I let it slide deciding instead to have my fun since he would be leaving back to post in a couple of weeks. I told him we lived in a gray area, where no one could judge us and neither of us had to commit to the other, but we could still exist. He agreed and we spent the most magical two weeks together, it was like before he'd joined and we'd sit in the park and talk for hours about nothing really. Soon after he left back to his military home and I thought I'd return to my life, but something was different and I just couldn't focus on anything. He'd call me and we'd text back forth, I knew I had feelings for him but I thought I could ignore them like I always did but I couldn't. Then one night he'd called me up and told me he loved me more than I could possible understand and asked me to be his girlfriend. Needless to say my heart practically leaped out my chest and I told him yes. Now I sit here in his place, with him asleep next to me and we are pushing 7 months. It's been a pretty difficult road, specifically because I'm still pretty uncertain if all this is real or whatever, but we're still going strong and I can honestly say I love him way more than I ever expected to love anyone. <3
SimplyMisunderstood SimplyMisunderstood
18-21, F
1 Response May 24, 2012

Wow, thank you for sharing your thoughts.