Why Do People Want Love If It Hurts So Much?

Have you ever heard a song from so long ago with so many memories tied to it that it made you cry? And didn't you with that you could go back into time when everything seemed so much simpler and carefree? Those are songs that are the soundtrack of our lives... the ones that bring back childhood memories, best friends, first love, first heartbreak... the memories.
Why did I break up with her? Well ,it's like, once I sat down and looked at the situation, all the pieces lying on the floor, it just wasn't a puzzle anymore. None of the pieces fit together. And even if I tried really hard, the pieces, well they were two different puzzles. That's why I did it, she needs to understand that.
I feel like I am sitting in a room full of people that I love, and you know what, they just don't care that I love them. They don't care whether or not I live or die. To them I'm just another stranger. To me, they are my best friends, the only people I have left.
I'm only me. That is all I can be. No more, no less, dont second guess. I love, I live, I laugh, I cry. I've wished sometimes that I could die. Some days I'm funny, others I'm not, sometimes I'm in overdrive and I can't stop. You may not like me, but that's okay because this is me and how I'll stay.
All our lives we search for someone to love, someone to make us complete. We choose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope, all the while wondering if somewhere, somehow, someone perfect is searching for us too.
Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits, The rebels, The troublemakers, The square pegs in round holes, The ones who see things differently. They aren't fond of rules, and they have no respect for status quota. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the one thing you can't do is ignore them because they change things. They push the human race forward and while some see crazy ones - we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that can change the world, are the ones that do.
You know, one day you look at the person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been flicked somewhere and the person who was just a friend is... suddenly the only person you can ever imagine yourself with.
Everything that ever caused a tear to trickle down my cheek, I run away and hide from it. But now, everything is unwinding and finding its way back towards me. And I don't know what to do. I just know that pain I felt so long ago, it's hurting ten time more.

It's the loneliest feeling in the world - to find yourself standing up when everyone else is sitting down. To have everybody look at you and say "what's the matter with him?" I know what it feels like. Walking down an empty street, listening to the sound of your own footsteps, Shutters closed, blinds drawn, doors locked against you. And you aren't sure whether you're walking toward something, or if you're just walking away.
You start life with a clean slate. Then you begin to make your mark. You face decisions, make choices. You keep moving forward. But sooner or later there comes a time where you look back over where you have been... and wonder who you really are.
Why I love you is a hard question to answer. I love you because you care for me like no one else I know. I love the way I feel in your arms, so safe from dangers in the world. I love your eyes, so hypnotic and mesmerizing, beautiful to gaze into, and yet never revealing everything to me. I can explain every way that I love you because that's in possible. But I can say I love you because I you are you.
It's like I realized that way down inside, I've always been lonely for something. But I don't know what for. It's like... everybody in the world wants something. Only they never really know exactly what it is - they just keep finding out what it's not.
Of course, you're going to get your heart broken. And it isn't just going to happen once, but a lot. That's just part of growing up, and it makes you stronger. Then you can handle it better next time. You may not get through it yourself, but your friends will help you through it. And you'll be a stronger person because of it. Then one day someone will come along, and it'll all pay off and no one will ever break your heart again.
There's one thing a quote does that nothing and no one else can do... it can become a part of you. You may never meet the person who said it but that person is now a companion. Quotes help you get over pain, feel love, make you smile and laugh, and helps you through those though tough days when you think that no one knows what you're going through.
I am Frustrated because I can't tell if it's real. Mad because I don't know how you feel. Upset because we can't make it right. Sad because I need you day and night. Angry because you won't take my hand, Aggravated because you don't understand. Disappointed because we can't be together, but still I'll love you forever.
People are always telling me to smile, like smiling is going to just take away all the hurt and pain. Well I've tried that... I've tried hiding my sorrows and covering the sadness in smiles... and what I've learned is that when it hurts this much inside your heart always has a way of showing it no matter how many masks you wear.

I love you. I love every little thing about you - your sexy smile, the sound of your voice, the magic in your eyes. I love your gentle touch and the warmth I feel at your side... I love dreaming about you. I love discovering you and letting go with you. I love each and every once in a lifetime moments I share with you... today, tomorrow, forever.
Okay, maybe, just maybe, there's another part of me, another girl, that lives deep inside of me. And maybe every once in awhile she cuts loose and does things that would blow some peoples minds. But if you ever mention her, or anything she might have done tonight, to another person, I will completely deny knowing anything about her.
In your life, you meet people. Some you never think about again. Some, you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they ever think about you. And then there are some you wish you never had to think about again. But you do.
Do you ever get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody? You don't want to smile and you don't want to fake being happy. But at the same time you don't know exactly what's wrong either. There isn't a way to explain it to someone who doesn't already understand. If you could want anything in the world it would be to be alone. People have stopped being comforting and being along never was. At least when you're alone no one will constantly ask you what is wrong and there isn't anyone who won't take 'I don't know' for an answer. You feel the way you do just because. You hope the feeling will pass soon and that you will be able to be yourself again, but until then all you can do is wait.
As the years pass and we grow apart, I want you to know that you guys are in my heart. You helped me through problems, through things good and bad. You helped me keep smiling when I was sad. You helped me with guys. You made me stay strong. How will I live, when you guys are gone? And where the years take us, no place is too far. We will think of each other wherever we are. You're wonderful people with good hearts to lend, and I want you to know that you'll always be my best friends!
I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned the hard way that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, or end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's to happen next.
This could be so much more. So much more than a casual kiss, and a quick caress beneath the sheets. This really could be the beginning of something, something that's takes us both somewhere, that translates both of us. Changes us. And we can only do it together.
I suppose I'm a little bit scared. You might not like it that I felt so much for him. But that was then. You are here now, you make me and define me. It's over after all but he's still a part of me. And I want you to know all about it, so there are no secrets.
This time it's over I'm keeping my heart, I'm gonna be strong and not fall apart... it'll get better, I'll no longer cry... in a couple of weeks I won't want to die, I won't want to go back. I'll be able to sleep, it won't hurt so bad and it won't hurt so deep!
Laying there with your arms around me I felt so comfortable and safe. My heart was beating a mile a minute having you so close to me. It made me never want to let you go.
We're so close but I know I'm just a friend to you. A friend by your side teaching you everything you do. A friend who would never leave you for someone new. A friend who won't make you feel blue. Only your friend who just happened to fall for you.
But its ironic because that's how I live my life. I smile on the outside, and everyone thinks I'm doing fine but I'm always dieing inside, always one step away from the edge you know? I can't be happy to be who I am because I don't know who I am anymore.
I know I'm not completely over her. She still crosses my mind several times a day, but with each one of those times, a feeling of contempt also passes through my heart. Maybe if this happens enough, my heart will become completely hardened to her, and I'll get to the point where she doesn't affect me anymore---
I'm afraid to give you my all, I'm afraid to love you completely. What if behind your beautiful face and kind words you are just bribing me. Maybe you are just reeling me in until you turn around and drop me. I'd fall so far and never be able to recover, I wish I could see the ending sometimes. I would know if I should hold on to you and keep going or just let it all end before I get up too high…

I miss all the little things. Like her hand resting on my knee and the way we'd share a big gooey ice cream. But I especially miss the hot nights in those motel rooms when he was all around me, the taste, and the scent and the feel of her. And I'd fall asleep in her arms, with the sound of her heartbeat being the last thing I heard before going to sleep. I ache with longing.
Everything you've said today, I've agreed with, it's been like listening to my own thoughts so I can't let you leave. And if you're horribly embarrassed by this then I don't care because it's the only time I've felt I was being true to myself in my whole life.
Love hurts. I say that because I know. Love is... or was amazing. It's an incredible feeling to know what she's going to say. It's more incredible the way she has me on the edge of my seat because she's so completely random, I never know what's coming next. It's hard to explain, but he filled some void in me, and now, without her, I'm missing something again. I wonder if it will ever truly, whole heartedly be filled again. I just don't want to know what it's like to hurt any more...
So I'm just thinking about how much I don't want my life to be boring. There is so much I want to do and so many places I want to go - but I don't really think it's ever gonna happen. I just don't wanna be one of those people who work somewhere they hate or live somewhere they don't want to live. But I feel like I'm gonna live here forever and not get a chance to see everything I want to see. I feel like my dreams are to unrealistic.
Sheetiz Sheetiz
22-25, M
Sep 23, 2012