Feel Like Such A Fool

I knew it wouldn't be easy.
I knew things for you were hard,
Nothing straightforward - no promises.
I knew all of this.

You said you had feelings for me,
Strong feelings.
You said you cared about me,
Would never hurt me.

You lied.

You come and go when it suits you -
talk is sparce and cold.
You're stresses have overtaken it all,
you won't let me in to help you,
You can't you say you can't.

I did. It helped. I trusted you.
I let you in when I died.
I talked and was honest and open.
You weren't.
I hate to think you lied.

You swear it's still the truth,
You have feelings, strong and true.
You care and would never hurt me.
But you did, didn't you.

You may claim not to have meant it,
You may say it was not pre-planned,
It wasn't your way of getting,
that which you demand.

You say your head is just swimming,
You can't see how to break free,
Your heart breaks all the time,
You long to be able to see,
Me, yourself, a break in the clouds,
to speak and laugh and breathe.

But what you seem to miss,
That which is a solid fact,
Is that you didn't mean to,
Break my heart in 2,
Doesn't make it hurt any less.