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My Ex.

I recently came home from college for Thanksgiving break. It's the first time I've been home since I broke up with my ex-boyfriend who always lives here. When I broke up with him, I told him eventually we could try and talk about the problems that we had, once I had time for myself to since about everything.

What kills me is that he said that he still had hope that we would get back together. I hoped that he would not, because I knew for sure that we would ever date again, unless some major changes happened.

Anyways, we share the same group of friends mostly, except now it seems like he kind of just with us only because he was with me because he hasn't been around lately. I was to go to a party, and and one of my friends said that my ex was invited, and I freaked out. I wasn't able to go to the party in the end, but it still made me think about how I'm actually going to act once I see him again.

I had this odd dream where we were all hanging out in a group, my ex and all these other people. It was the first time I saw him, and he acted like we were still together. He was smiling and putting his arm around me, and it weirded me out. How is he going to act when he sees me? Like we're still good friends, or is he just going to ignore me? Either way, it's going to be awkward.
pauserewind pauserewind 18-21, F Nov 22, 2012

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