Enough Is Enough

I'm an only child and was relatively well behaved and didn't get into too much trouble.  My father left my mother when I was six and they got divorced.    I stayed with my mother but was allowed to see my father once a year (he moved across country).  my mother never forgave him for leaving her (she is a total pain in the arse, he was a real catch),  even though she always had cool boyfriends later on, musicians, artists, she never forgave him.   At ten years of age my father asked if he could fly me out for Christmas.  My mother said, the choice is yours darling, but if you go see him, you can never come back to me.  Ever.

 

A tough concept on any level to deal with when you are ten years old.  I stayed with my mother and she cut me off from my father completely (this being pre-e-mail days).    I'm not only the splitting image of my father but we have many similar character traits.  And as I grew older I really started to look like my dad,  which she resented so much to the point that when we were in a car together she would often threaten to drive us off a cliff to kill us.  (this on the rather treacherous road to school).  You can imagine what condition I arrived at school in.

I left home two days after finishing school (with my own $40 in my pocket) and went travelling around the world for ten years working all kinds of jobs, living in Asia and New York and having a ball.  We kept sporadic contact by letters, almost all from my side.  After ten years I took my fiance to meet her (my fiance begged me) and within 24 hours my fiance realized that I was right about leaving all that behind and moving on.  We left the next day.

A year later 1994, I was living in New York, running my own company and married and I called her up to say goodbye.  I said I loved her but that I was never going to have her in my life any more.   

And I've never spoken to her since and its been the best thing I ever did.   And she never realized the most simple thing.  Man is not always looking for someone to love them,  they want someone they can love.

sorry for the long rambling story.  zippy

zippyp zippyp
41-45, M
1 Response Mar 8, 2009

Thanks for the story. My son too looks so much like his father.<br />
In spite of my contentment towards his father I remind myself that if he wasn't for him I wouldn't have been so blessed.