Geeky Freshman In Av Club


Everyone needs to laugh at themselves once in a while.  I hope you enjoy my geekdom...

I joined the AV Club when I was a freshman in high school.  With my geekiness oozing, I was responsible for retrieving AV equipment from classrooms and bringing it back to the library at the end of the school day.  One time I was asked to pick up a TV and VCR from an unfamiliar room. 

As I walked down the lonely halls, I agonized over who would be attending class.  Once I arrived, I cracked open the door and peeked inside the classroom.  Cold beads of sweat immediately formed on my forehead, armpits, and every other one of my developing teenage areas.  It was a home economics class, filled mostly with upper-class girls.

I gained my composure and strode into the room with as much confidence as a lanky, testosterone dripping freshman could muster.  I could hear giggles and whispering as I stumbled across the room to begin my struggle with a towering rack, loaded with TV and VCR.

The prized equipment was clearly across the room, and I figured pulling it out backwards would be the best option.  As my clammy hands wrapped around the cold, steel frame, I noted to myself, “Just focus, don’t make eye contact, and have it look easy.”  I felt as if I were in the presence of a pack of wolves, waiting to pounce at any display of weakness.

I began to pull the TV stand out of the room, slowly taking each step backwards and gaining confidence with every inch I gained.  The teacher stopped talking as I heaved the heavy beast across the checker tiles.  I was disrupting her lesson and became the focus of the room.  The pressure was unbearable as everyone had their eyes on me.  I was acutely aware that the duration of my virginity was directly tied to these tense moments.

The play-by-play still loops through my head.  It unfolds as I remember thinking to myself, “ Step by jerky movements… quickly, but not obvious about escape.”  I continued; 

Be cool…you’re doing OK…only a couple more steps to the door…

…reach behind and grasp the door knob…turn the knob…

…pull open the door…almost there…

…tow the cart through the doorway…

…going into the dark hallway <dark hallway?>…

…tripping over mop and broom..?  What the?!?!

I had just successfully guided myself to the wrong door and directly into the closet.  Instead of the sweet freedom of the hallway, I was trapped inside the closet with the #@$%^!@ TV cart.  Not only that, but I also managed to create an avalanche of janitorial supplies that made me trip and fall to the floor.  %&!#$*!!!

All I could hear was laughing.  I might have even heard a couple of REALLY PRETTY girls pass out from lack of oxygen.  I should have just shut the door and sat in darkness while the cackling teacher tried her best to restore order.  It would have been a nice opportunity to get better acquainted with my virginity.  It was going to be a long, fruitful friendship.

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1 Response Dec 26, 2009

But then you blossomed into the glorious you who is able to plug in the dvd pla<x>yer, add surround sound, control the remote (instead of letting the remote control you)... And you build way cool cars n race 'em. Oh yes, I know you, you manly thing ; )