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I Learned This The Hard Way

I used to believe I could change or "fix" other people . Only in the past 4 1/2 years since I quit drinking and have practiced the 12 steps have I come to realize that I can only change myself and nobody else. This information came to me at a heavy price though. I used to get with these men who I thought I could mold or change into something better or ....well you get the idea. I was with this one who got into a crack habit and he went into rehab. I thought he was cured and I tried to help change his wicked ways but I failed to do that and he ended up beating and robbing me in the end. I sent him to prison for what he did but you cannot take away the emotional scars. I am just glad that I have finally learned that I cannot change anybody but myself and do not even try to any more.
cinfullynn cinfullynn 46-50, F 4 Responses Oct 29, 2011

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Sorry to hear what happened but you definitely speak the truth here!

Have you had more than one sponsor ?

I do not believe in perfection, there is nothing to strive for if we think we r perfect. I did however forgive him for what he did because we forgive people for ourselves not for them.

Mm, I found out to! the only thing you have power over is your thoughts! once you gain control of your thoughts there will be no emotional scars unless you want them!<br />
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and the other thing is you are perfect! you don't need to apologize to anybody! but you do need to forgive!

Thanks.