Why Don't More People Get This?

I live near a major international airport and I laugh when there are people who moved into their neighborhoods when the airport was already established, decide years later to complain about the noise.

Are you f-ing kidding me?

Today, I commented on a story about people wanting to delete EP "fans" without having to block them.

And, I am continually getting into discussions with people who insist that "there should be a law!" to stop so-and-so.

Really, we can only change ourselves. So many people have learned the art of bitching. They want the world to change to make things easier for them. It's tiring.

On the other hand, better for me. They spend more time bitching. I spend time making adjustments so that have more time to enjoy life.
NoLongerHere NoLongerHere
41-45, M
4 Responses May 7, 2012

Well aren't you talking about two different things here? I mean I agree with the whole bitching thing. Its a waste of time. However, I think you can change people or should I say influence change in people.

A great movie from the early 60's about human behavior is "If A Man Answers" (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0056093/) Obviously, much of this is tongue in cheek, but there's an underlying reality.

Most of us are conditioned to want certain things and to react to certain things. It's human nature.

When we embark to change others, we are, in fact, changing ourselves.

I agree with that, but I also think you can also change others.... :)

Care to provide an example where someone was changed by another?

Well, off the top of my head...why do we have mentors for people? To set example so they can follow and learn from right? But I don't think it has to be in such a formal setting. Look at a parent to a child teaching right from wrong or responsibility,a friend to a friend wanting to lose weight, a teacher to a student, etc. People you hang around influence the person you are. Therefore they can bring about change in some one else. Like a religious leader to a follower...I'm sure I could list more if I took some time. Cant I just show you my breasts and we agree??

There's a big difference between changing someone vs. providing them a virtual mirror to allow them to see their true nature. If progress was governed by mentoring, then there would never be any true progress because the best one could hope for is to be as good as the mentor.

Mentors, teachers, parents... we provide perspective, typically based on the experience of having been there and done that. We do not change others. We demonstrate those actions that are effective vs. ones that are not. The student or child then seeks his or her own way, ideally surpassing the teacher in ability.

We can guide others, but others can always choose another path. We can provide inspiration...

So yes, please show me the goods. ;)

Im not saying by mentoring we are cloning people and they follow as they see. Like you said, it's a guide. Some people are followers not leaders so you will always have some who just do as they see and then you will others that exceed that. We do change others with our opinions and examples. We aren't talking about choosing paths for people, you said change. How do you want to measure change? To what degree would you consider change? If our examples didn't help influence change in people there would be no need to do that then? I truly believe we do have the power to help change people. Yes, ultimately they have the power but we can direct their visions.
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You can change babies in some of the larger supermarkets. I've seen notices up

LOL! :) You are right!

5 More Responses

Well said.

You're on a roll today dearest! *giggles*

It does free up loads of time and reduce stress when folks stop trying to micromanage the entire universe!! :D Some of the folks who want to be the, "boss of the world" seem to have the biggest problems with making good choices for themselves...Maybe if they'd leave other folks be and focused on the changes they need to make with just themselves..they'd be a lil happier!!