How Can He Just Move On Like I Was Never There

Me an my boyfriend have lived together for a while. We have had our ups and downs. But one day he just said he did not love me anymore!? I am so hurt an devistated. Deeply hurt beyond anything I have ever felt. I am in my 30's so I am not young but I never hurt this way before. So I thought if I talked to him things would change an they did an for about a week I thought everything was fine bitHe again said he doesn't love me.I been stuck in my room I have tried to go out with my friends as he does but I don't feel right. I am so heartbroken I can't even work. I just feel like I am getting closer to death of the pain doesn't stop everyday I just get worse. I called crisses lines but they obviously have never been unloved to.say I need to just get over it.. its not that easy not at all.I wishing could just grab him an shake him or make him feel the pain he has causedMe.

I no its alot to read. I feel so sad an desperate like I never mattered. In turn I have been hurt by every man I ever felt anything for. People say I need to move on. I have tried I think what I want is him to say he understands an hold me an help me thru my needs don't matter. I am lost and please don't say I need meds or a counselor I tried that its no help
ctalar81 ctalar81
31-35, F
2 Responses Jan 9, 2013

Hang in there. I promise you will start to feel better soon. My ex and I broke up pretty much on our 10 year anniversary because he was lost and needed to find himself. He said he loved me but he wasn't in love with me. I was really devastated especially since we have a kid together. It takes time to heal and figure out you will be ok and maybe this was best for both of you. It took me a good 3 months. I didn't understand how he could move on so fast to someone else but I realized that made my someone new is alot more special and will take more time. Did he heal in time? From the looks of things no but karma is a B. Just sayin'. Anyway, if you ever want someone to listen let me know. My advice is start doing what you have missed since you two were together. Visit with family and friends. Don't listen to all the negative about your ex because it just makes things worse. It's time to work on you for awhile. Don't rush moving on. It just happens and I've learned that doesn't have to mean moving on to someone new.

Thank you for ur comment. I always thought it was karma. Tonight I tried killing myself an something. Came over me a very peaceful feeling an I stopped an for once I felt loved I truly believe God new my pain an to make it better my ex husband called just hearing his. Voice reminded me I am loved this guy may not love me an I thought it was all over but I somehow feel a great sense of love an I no longer need him...

It may be kind of silly to respond, because I'm only 15 and you're much more experienced than I am, but I kind of recently went through the same thing. Its terrible when you think life is fine, and the person you love most in this world, doesn't feel the same. You just want to slap the sh** out of them, so they can feel a speck of what you're feeling.

My first boyfriend, which we just ended a relationship, went from being what I thought was "the one", to someone who I can't even recognize. Materialistic, and very friend and money oriented. I am slowly recovering from it all, but its not easy and I don't know of a person who could just get over someone with the snap of their fingers.

Your relationship has been much more advanced than mine, plus I'm a kid, so I can't really give you "groundbreaking" super-awesome theraputic advice. But I will tell you this: Any man who treats you like this, doesn't deserve your effort. I know thats the last thing you want to hear because you want him to be there for you now, but trust me.

I'm sure you have your flaws and your achievements, but overall you deserve the best and can be a wonderful girlfriend!! I think you guys honestly need to talk, and you have to tell him how you feel and discover how you feel. I honestly, honestly, honestly, suggest you guys take a break. Go somewhere and discover something new about yourself. Its not easy to do. When I was severely depressed for 2 months I would just go home, watch South Park, and eat pizza. And cry it out. Perhaps thats what you need right now. But I have to say, this awful crap that has happened to me, it let me to write agian. These terrible experiences led me to paint agian. It may not sound like a break through, but it was to me. I'm still totally hurt, and I even cried today. But I called my dad, he helped me through it and we made some plans for tomorrow, and somehow I know I'll be okay.

Just keep on doing whats good for you. Perhaps he is going through a phase and he doesn't even know what the hell he wants. You have to show him you're strong, and although I know how much you want him to hold you right now, you can't change him. You deserve the best, don't think you don't, don't go to a therapist or take crappy medication, you have to fight it and do whats good for you. Take a break, go somewhere, do something, just cry until your eyes blow up like two balloon! Eventually you'll realize you need to get up and do somethings. And then, after the break, if he doesn't know what he wants and chooses to leave something great (you), thats his dumb choice, you'll find someone who understands you and will love you. No matter if you believe it or not, you'll find that person. But you just have to preoccupy yourself, and understand the whole situation.

Thank you for your kind words no mattress what age you are hurt is hurt. Its only been two weeks I can't see into tomorrow I no it will come but I can't change that. U seem like a very strong girl. I can only wish to be so strong.

You can be just as strong, just do your own thing and see what happens. Unfortunatley, thats the only thing you can do.

Sometimes during these times you kind of lose your faith in life. But you have to find that faith, sometimes I just go and read my horoscope or call a phsycic, even though what they tell you can and cant be true, if they tell you something it preoccupies your mind.

I also Just talk to the universe and wish for hopes and dreams, and somehow I have this gut feeling they will come true.