Can't Let Go Of Hope

My boyfriend of just over a year broke up with me 6 weeks ago completely out of the blue! We are both 21 and had a pretty serious relationship and practically lived together for 6 monhs of it. To me our relationship was perfect! He was my best friend and I loved him more than anything. We would argue occasionally, but no more than most couples. We shared interests, had a very similar sense of humour, and generally just got on amazingly!
Anyway, he broke up with me because he said he didnt want a relationship right now! He feels he is very young and he has been struggling with work etc. at the moment and just wants time to concentrate on himself and get his life in order. He has had quite a dramtic family life and has always had to look out for others, so i think he worries about having to think about me all the time as well! He loves me very much and I know thats true, he says he would love it if things could work out in the future but cant guarantee what will happen, and doesnt want me to put my life on hold for him. The thing is, i want to wait, because as crazy as it may sound at 21, I do feel like he is my soulmate! I just know he wont be ready for a serious commitment for a long time. He says if its meant to be it will be and we just need to let time run its course! Buy im a very impatient person! Im struggling with the thought that things will maybe never work out and because of that am finding it hard to accept that this IS a break up! On top of that, a lot has happened in the time since we broke up and i think i may have pushed him away by not being able to let go. I dont know if its too late for us.
I just need help letting go and letting the future be what it will be! At the moment i am waiting for the day to come when we get back together, which is only a possibility, not a fact!
An Ep User An EP User
3 Responses Jan 11, 2013

My ex said pretty much exactly the same thing when he broke up with me. Maybe for you, he is being honest and open about his real feelings, but in my experience this is just a lie to get you to keep yourself open to him while he looks for something else. This is what my ex did to me and I would hate for this to happen to you. Believe me there is nothing worse than holding on to someone just to realize later that they were using you and don't need you anymore once they find something else. Please be careful.

Your story sounds so much like mine. You and your ex reminds me of a younger version of me and my ex. I am so impatient about everything. I know exactly what you are going through. I wish I had a definate answer for you because it sucks going through it. I will keep you in my prayers.

I spent much of my high school years with the same boyfriend. It really holds you back so I can see what your guy is talking about. Stay away from boys for a while you'll see how much fun you can have! And some advice act like you're moving on and don't try or bug him. Act like you're having the time of your life and he will be back(: