Leaving The Past Behind

I grew up in a strict catholic family. We had to pray before every meal and before going to bed (on our knees). We were not allowed to talk to each other, watch TV or listen to music on Good Friday. I guess that is why I am confused and looking to change the future.

My father loved to hit first and ask questions later. He used a belt and hit very hard. I eventually found a way to cope with the beating. I am looking to leave the past behind and start my life new. I plan to do things differently than my parents now that I am on my own.

walkingslowly walkingslowly
26-30, F
11 Responses Feb 23, 2010

I do not think any religion teach people to be a cruel whether it is Catholic, Islam, Jews. Just forget your dad's torture. Wish you a happy future life.

i think <br />
<br />
the women like angel <br />
i have only one advice (( why you walk when you can fly ))!!<br />
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open you eyes <br />
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talk listen lough cry do what you like to do<br />
<br />
but dont forget you are an angel you can flay over all your past<br />
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past like book<br />
<br />
we can close it ~~~

hope you find the way for yourself

Good for you - no sense in continuation of terrible parenting.....I'm sure you more than likely resent your father now?<br />
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What a shame. Hope it all works out.

First I want to say how sorry I am to hear of what you went through in your home. There's a great line from that film "Parenthood". Keanu Reeves said something like, you need a license for almost everything in the world, why don't parents need to be licensed, that almost any *expletive* can become a parent. <br />
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Shoot maybe the world would be a better place if parents needed to be licensed before having a kid.<br />
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My early childhood wasn't as strict as yours, there wasn't praying in the home, but your story still hit pretty close to home. It would be my mom that hit me, maybe because dad was to drunk to care. Anyway it was always Mass on Sundays, where the folks put on this faux front of being perfect parents and catechism classes on Fridays. <br />
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One thing that was literally beaten into me, don't mess around in church, a giggle at what somebody that did funny, or squriming around in the pew, particularly when kneeling, always was received with a smack later on when we got home. <br />
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I never did have much to give up during Lent so that was never much of a sacrafice for me. I do remember this one time a friend of mine from school had giving me half a candy bar on a Friday. Well even though I hadn't formally given up candy for Lent, according to my mom all kids gave up candy and other sweets during Lent. Well when I got home and my mom found that half a candy bar in my jacket pocket, something I was going to try to save for when Lent was over, there was the devil to pay and more, even though I tried to explain that I hadn't eaten it, this part was given to me but I was called nothing but a liar. The beating I received probably wasn't the worse part of that incident, but the prolonged kneeling at my bed and my mom just saying the most horrible obscenities imaginable to a 9 year old kid, that I was going to hell, I was such a worthless kid, so forth and so on.<br />
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It was about then, even at that young age, I started wondering what kind of religion is it that would let a little boy get such harsh treatment for something he didn't even do in the first place, and even if he did eat half that candy bar, was what I received for punishment justified.<br />
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At age 12 when I was removed from that situation and went on to live with some terrific kind nuturing folks, they were pretty liberal minded folks. Even though Catholic themselves they never brought the wrath of god down on me when I finally got the courage to ask if I could please stay home from church on Sundays. Same with CYO classes, they never forced me to go and if I felt like attending a class now and then I did it was more to be with my friends than anything else. But really I got nothing out of it and to this day I don't belong to any type of religion.<br />
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Anyway again want to say I'm sorry for what you went through and that you are finding peace within yourself.

Good for you for moving past the past, it makes the future alot brighter <3 <br />
I attended a very strict Catholic school through middle school and if you had the same Catholic values that I did instilled in you that good ol' Catholic guilt will keep you from abandoning the "Catholic part of you" --- Damned if you do and damned if you don't sometimes it seems but as long as your you then you'll be fine to move past and higher than you ever dreamed <3 <3 <3

As long as I breath I will never understand how a aprent can find so much joy in beating there own flesh and blood, just turns my stomach upside down. I've grown up in a strict catholic faith as well and I remember being taught how loving the afther can be and yet the exaple isn't taken seriousley

No parent had a right to hi there child out of anger, nor use fist or a back hand. We as parnts are supose to teach our children love and make sure that they never endure pain. What has this world come to when a parent has to beat there own flesh and blood? Because they love them?

Thank you eelarc and paigerobinwillow,<br />
I will probably remain catholic only not live as strict a lifestyle as my parents.<br />
I am on my own now, and plan to live my life as I want to live it. I want to leave the past behind but it is difficult to just forget it.

Exactly, just remember, your not your parents. You are your own person and just because your dad hurt you, and you were brought up in a catholic family, it doesn't mean that you are any less of a person. If anything, your more of a person because you put up with it. You go girl!

Your dad had no right to treat you that way, but you have seen the light and come out the other side. You have choices with regards to your religion, just because you were born into a catholic family it doesn't mean you have to be catholic. Now you can break free and live your own life how you want to live it!