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Lost 20s

Unrequited Love

I am being forced to walk away.  It took so much of my time and energy, that I could not (or maybe would not) see my life for what it is.  A most beautiful love bestowed upon someone most unworthy.  I would give him my final ounce of love if I was not being forced to leave.  I was used, betrayed, lied to just to be some sort of a trophy wife.  I still have 'it' in me, and I am waking up and walking away knowing that I did everyhthing I could.  The best years of my life were stolen and I face this new decade of my life with great anticpation and wonder.  I am weakened from being taken, but I see nothing but hope.  I regret that my love will not be joining me on this new adventure, but he is the one who held me back from loving the world. 

 

Please listen to this beautiful song and amazing cover.  You will not be disappointed:

 



 

lifeorregret lifeorregret 31-35, F 1 Response Mar 8, 2010

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Beautiful song - very moving. I feel for you - I spent the better part of my life with someone who treated me the same. It wasn't quite the same since we were both straight men, but we were like brothers. You've got a beautiful attitude about all this, and it's great that you've got the courage to speak it aloud, and to face it. You're doing something great for your kids too - you're fighting battles that most people never have the courage to fight.<br />
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"I could not (or maybe would not) see my life for what it is. " I wouldn't see it for what it was either - it would have destroyed me to see it for what it was before I was ready. While I was in the throws of grief at losing him, a very wise woman told me "look at your own part in this - what was it that you got out of it... maybe a twisted version of something you could get in a more healthy way." She was right - in seeing him for what he was, I was forced to look at my side of it - the ways in which I was similar to him. I realized that from my side of things, I was my father and he was my mother.<br />
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"I regret that my love will not be joining me on this new adventure, but he is the one who held me back from loving the world. " Absolutely! The trans-formative battles you're fighting are battles that most people don't have the strength to face. It always hurts to grieve for the death of a relationship - it's like a part of us is dying... but in dying, we gain more than we lose. You're an amazing person.