I Cannot Express My Feelings

I cannot express my feelings and real inner voices before anyone who know me very well.
I always pretend my self infront of others that make me crazy. Whenever anybody near to me is very sad, i like to speak encouraging words but i cant speak any words eventhough the words are in my tongue.
Really i cant express my feeling infront of them because of my shyness and sad mentality inspite of it i may express cruel words to them and make them upset. I many times paradoxically expresses my real nature as cruel words.
This made my gf to split up the relationship. I always like to be alone.
So many persons liked to contact me but i feel to express nothing to them and this made me alone in the friends circle also.
I feel very shy to express my feelings in words, this made to think them that i am not loving and caring them, eventually they ended up the relationships. So i am always alone and making me jelousy to others, how others keep relationships very healthy. when my lover in sad, i feel to express my sadness to her, but i cant speak any words to her in order to ease her. So many times she reminded me i am not loving and caring her. All this ended up in the brokeage of relation. This all crap things make me feel crazy.
I dont have good relationship with my parent because of them are not accepting my words and feelings, they not giving me helping hands whenever required. So i decided to not to say my feelings to them.
anilkuttappan anilkuttappan
36-40, M
1 Response May 6, 2012

U made the 1st step, you recognice your problem, now is just slowly make tha change