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I Don't Really Want To....

If I were to be honest about this - at this point - I don't want to forget about him!  Whether that be right or wrong - I have no idea - but at this point, forgetting about him - thinking about that makes me hurt MORE than just not having him in my life right now... at least right now, I have hope - even if we were to just end up being friends again someday!

DorothyofOz DorothyofOz 41-45, F 7 Responses Oct 10, 2010

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I'm not sure he had a choice... (about dropping out of my life)

Zfrog - you are a hoot!!! I do notice that the "related groups" are not always that related!!! LOL!!<br />
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This person did not hurt me - which I guess is good in one way - but in others, makes it harder for me to get over - plus, the gift of his friendship will be something I will never forget - I doubt he will forget our friendship either - it was special to both of us - always will be! But how can you forget someone you have known for 27 years?! I don't think you can!<br />
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As always, thanks for the really fun comment!<br />
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DESTRY - hugs back to you my friend - hope you are doing okay!!!

Lily - I understand why you are feeling the way that you are feeling - I feel that way very often myself, but underneath, my hope that I someday will have a love that is a big step away from what I have now will not go away. I think if I didn't have that hope I would go stark raving mad in my situation right now. <br />
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I sometimes wish that you would just tell your husband you either show me some affection - show me that you care about ME v. a person that lives with you and takes care of you - you need to tell him once and for all - I am miserable existing like this - feeling emotionally abandoned - and that if he can't do that or won't do that - say it now! Then YOU, Lily can decide how you want to handle that information. I know he physically needs you to be there - to take care of him - but I think at that point, after all that you have put up with and stuck with him - you need to let go of your guilt! <br />
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Am I making any sense? I am just having a rough morning here in my wonderful life (sarcasm) so I may be a little skewed in my advice. It is just pitiful to me that we have to beg our spouses to LOVE us!! It is especially pathetic when these men have some wonderfully caring and loving women in their lives and they don't even recognize it!

Well, this is a very difficult topic for me. Everyone we encounter in life changes us in some way. So really, how can you ever forget? And I can never let go of hope. Even when it all seems impossible. To do so, seems so final, so sad to me. However, you must remember I'm also a very foolish woman so no one should pay any attention to me ... lol.

To be totally honest with you. The man that haunted me for over 30 years, doesn't haunt me any more. I'm happy to be rid of him. Now I'm just trying to get those memories out over my current love, after that, that's it for me. I'm tired of hurting, my heart can take no more pain, not in the romantic way anyway. I mean none of us want pain BUT I can do something about the romance in my life. My husband gives me none so I don't have to worry about him but the last two, one as you know I dont see in a romantic way. The other Im hoping will soon be out of my life as far as romance anyway. I would like to keep him as a friend. Even though he doesn't think it's possibly for two people who use to love each other romantically to only stay as friends. I know better.<br />
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I do understand how you feel about NOT wanting to let go. I use to feel the same way. I have had it with love and men. So I just want to get my heart to mend and then rest, no more romance for me. It's the only way. I feel good about this, even excited, that means, no more pain for Lily. I will close that door, never to open it again...:-)

I am not surprised that you do! Thanks for commenting!!

Awwww I know that feeling.