Knowing You๐Ÿ˜’

Growing up as a Muslim American with a heritage background of Somalia; I've always been different! It was easy growing up, I had a mom and a dad just family around me! My life was great!!! Then I turned eight๐Ÿ˜ฏ during a weekend trip in Seattle a Somalian lady with her beautiful vail and colorful traditional dihra (a dress) came up to me and my aunt and said to me in our native tongue "omg it's like I'm looking at your dad, rip ******" I quickly corrected her and said my daddy isn't dead he's at work,you got the wrong person! My aunt told me to go to the car. When she and the nice woman with vail finished talking my aunt came back with a strange facial expression. ๐Ÿ˜’๐Ÿ˜’ She told me that the lady did no my father and that I do look just like him!! My stomach dropped and my eyes felt watery. She explained to me the death of my real biological father๐Ÿ˜ช๐Ÿ˜ฉ I didn't understand I had a complete family!? My father is dead? When where why? Why didn't my mother tell me? Why did she make me feel like that man (what he became) was my father! After that day my aunt made me promise that I would wait for my mother to tell me. I turned 13 and still had this secret I looked at everything totally different! At 15 still nothing my step dad took his 3 kids by my mother to portland Maine to meet his sister. Both parents tried there best to cover up the fact I was the black sheep the said my grandmother needed me to stay with her while they went on their vacation. I planned the rest of my life that day I knew I was only getting older and the secret was only burning my heart for 7 years since finding out I watched this man do a half job of being there for me and my mom slipping away from me to be with her family unit. We'll I can't put everything else that happened or this would be a bio ๐Ÿ“ My mother and husband kicked me out at 16. I was homeless there were so many nights that I questioned god there were so many nights I felt like if my father was alive I wouldn't go through the half. I'm now 20 me and my mothers relationship still hasn't changed much but her husband pretty much doesn't speak to me. He's never apologized for imitating my father! I thank for wanting to replace that role yu can say but it's never the same I deserve to know!! My mother however I just can't believe that she still has never giving me the information that makes me Me! I feel like I won't be whole until I know who and where I am from and I wanted it from her.Until then Ill always feel half a person.
Forgotten23 Forgotten23
18-21, F
1 Response Dec 11, 2012

Wow, you didn't get a chance to meet your real father, that's really sad. Friends?

No I never met him. Rip I know he loves me that's what keeps me searching and going. Friends ๐Ÿ‘ญ