Is This Forever?

It's complicated and everyone keeps telling me to leave... The first things someone who has been cheated on knows. I'm 15 he's 16 and weve been together for a little over a year and a half. The thing is the past haunts me... Our very hard past. We started dating April 6th of 2010, about 6 months and a vacation to Mexico with my parents in I found out he cheated on me, with a family friend. He even told her he loved her and it worked since she was grounded. He asked her to homecoming instead of me and told me his god brother had a friend playing in the game and the girls brother was going with them, not knowing at that time he had asked her. This continued for about two weeks to four days after his birthday. He was asleep at my house after football one day and she texted him not knowing he was with me, and of course when his phone vibrated I checked because I would text his mom back and or wake him up for her. He promised me he would never do it again. Until one day one of his god brothers 20 year old friends came into town, at this time he was fifteen, he left me for her, me unknowing that, and we got back together a week later on Halloween, which I later found out he still spent making out and messing around with her. And then I didn't find that out until later on, and this was on Christmas. I had had some problems for three years with girls at my school so I switched, conveniently and uncontrollably to his, mostly because of a girl named Chloe. Well On Christmas eve still being spiteful she called me to inform me he had been at her house a couple days before that when he told me he was taking a nap. I cried all that night to my mom, and the next day he showed up at my house with a promise ring. My mom told his parents who intern started crying because they loved me and his dad had taken him over there because he said they were planning my surprise birthday party. And about a month later after forgiving him, yes you probably think I'm stupid but I love him and he was my first, eight days before my birthday I had to work a basketball game, that he didn't want me too, he later showed up and my friends sent me pictures from the main gym of him hangin out with the school ****. I didn't talk to him for days, just went out, and went out, and went out. All of his family members were calling me, so they ended up coming to my birthday which we ended up back together and until June everything was perfect. Then I found out he was planning on going to Chloe's best Friends party and lied. I left school I got so sick, he walked to my house from school that day. And now he has really changed and is faithful and I'm friends with all of his friends and hangout with them, but I can't help to want to cheat back sometimes to see how it would feel, to know if there truly is still that feeling of just wanting to be with one person or what I would do after. I don't know, it's months later and it still hairs me everyday and it kills me all the time.
Maadiisoon Maadiisoon
18-21, F
2 Responses Nov 26, 2011

You are too young to waste your time on this guy. You have your whole life in front of you. Chances are, you will go through several boyfriends before you finally settle down. Take this as a great experience and go on with your life. Do not lose anymore sleep over this guy.

Look i read halƒ your story and i dont like him alreADY.I dont wanna be all judgemental but hes stepping over you and your letting it go on ƒor to long already.I know how it ƒeels when they say leave him n its hard cuz i been through that but i didnt let him do it to many times like that.At least try to leave him ƒor a lil bit and show him you dont care no more he will realize your not playing anymore.Its hard but youll get over it trust me.