Not Over My Boyfriend Cheating On Me... What Do I Do??

Me and my boyfriend have been going out for a year and a half... December 2010 is when we started dating and the oncoming April I found out he cheated on me with his DISGUSTING ugly ex girlfriend... and to make things worse I found out about 4 months later. I never got over that and I made it very clear to him, I always broke down crying in his arms about it but everyone deserves a second chance so I gave him one. (Mistake) I always heard rumors about some girl who has been flirting with him since day 1. At first I didn't say much when I saw texts between them and he used :) which he never really used with me. Then I started getting annoyed when she picked him as his cheerleader for hockey. She gave him candy in victorias secret bags with her phone number on the bag or "P.S you're sexy ;)" I told all my friend and my boyfriend that I KNEW she would be the one to ruin our relationship. I even talked to the girl about it and she seemed very convincing that there was nothing going on and I didn't have to worry. Sure enough a year later he has sex with her, then has sex with her AGAIN and he claimed both times he was too drunk to even remember and she took control and he was passed out (lies) She was also in a relationship and I'm convinced they both literally love each other because why else would I have a problem with the same girl for a year and a half if he didn't like her then I wouldn't have to deal with her all the time, right? and the worst part is now the girl and the ex girlfriend are like best friends because they share the common bond of having sex with my boyfriend. I'm not over it at all it's been 3 months since I found out and I already assumed they did have sex I just needed to hear it from someone else. I cry about it everyday and I'm still with him because I don't know what's worse, being sad with him or being sad without him I'll never trust him again and about 5 days a week I'm upset about it and it ruins both of our days. Should I just drop it? He always tells me to get over it but it's literally so hard I can't get it out of my head how my boyfriend who I thought loved me could just do that with another girl and not feel bad about it AT ALL because he goes and does it again like WTF???? sorry I really needed to get this on writing I was hoping it would help me out somehow
linds1226 linds1226
18-21, F
May 17, 2012