My Best Friend

I've always had two best friends.  I got my heart broken by ex-girlfriend who was one of them, 5 months ago. I've maintained my other best friend. But she recently told me that all the times all three of us hung out it made her jealous, she never knew why. She is a girl who is 16 and her whole life has liked boys. I always had a lot of love for her. But sometimes i couldn't always explain my love. Even when i was dating my ex, I got super jealous when my other best friend would talk to guys, or flirt with them. It would make me so mad. I never knew why..and i always asked myself why. Me and her have been friends for like 2 years. But she recently just told me that she has feelings for me. I mean..when i was dating my ex i wasn't sure what i felt for my other best friend. But now that I'm single were still friends..but like a month ago i kissed her. Since a month ago, we've basically had a thing. The problem that she is 16 and Im going to be 20 in 2 months. She is going to be a junior in high school, when Im going to be a freshman in college. It feels so weird because she doesn't even have her license. At the same time, i feel like Im just scared that i could get my heart broken again if i fall too deep. Im not sure why Im coming up with all these excuses to not want to be with her. Or maybe it is wrong? I had my ex tell me after a year that we were together tell me that the reason she broke up with me is because she was never sure she liked girls. She tells me she likes boys. I feel like she is going to do the same thing to me. I feel like after a while, she may say the same thing. I don't want to lose my only best friend either. Our relationship is so complicated. Its like were not dating each other but we still kiss each other from time to time...not always. How can i get this straight? I don't want to hurt her, or myself...can someone please give me some advice? What do i do?
Brokenhearted33 Brokenhearted33
18-21, F
Jul 10, 2010