Life Is Funny, Beautiful, Sad, Magic, Amazing. It Is Hard To Believe I Have Depression.

I suffer from depression. I have had depression for years. I try really hard not to let it affect my life. Most of the time it doesn't, however sometimes it raises it's ugly head and lets me know it's there, lurking behind my eyes, inside my brain, waiting to pounce when I have a weak moment.
I have been to doctors, who just like to give me pills for depression. I cope on my own without medication. If you are reading this please don't decide to throw your medication away. Depression is different for everybody. Some people need medication, others dont. I am lucky enough to be able to function without medication.
I have a good life. I have four lovely chidren and an awesome granddaughter. I am close to my sisters and parents. Surrounded by loving family is very important to me, as it keeps me in check and allows me to function normally. What is Normal?
I wish that I didn't have depression. I know what bought it on. I can't change that situation. Depression is a part of me now, it's part of my life and it doesn't bring me down. I just live with it.
Sometimes when I least expect it, the depression takes a hold of my life and it really knocks me around. I should seek help or get some counseling for it, however I always tell myself I am too busy, I am okay, I don't need it. In reality I do need counseling. I am just too stubborn to seek help.
I have a nice home. I have a great garden. When life gets too hard you will find me in my garden, talking to my plants. It's great therapy and I love to plant flowers, transplant my herbs, rearrange my garden, change the types of plants in each section of my garden. I get by day by day, my plants and my family help me out a lot.
cassiejoy cassiejoy
46-50, F
May 18, 2012