I Cant Get My Life On Track

i am a 34 year old woman with a young child who cant seem to keep a job . Ever since i started working at 17 i have yet to hold down a job for longer than a year and a half. i suffer from major insecurities and always unsure of my skills and as a result cannot function in an office setting. i know i am rambling but i own a professional degree and cant seem to pass my state exam, i also cant seem to hold a job long enough to save money to move out of the one bedroom apartment i have been living in since i was in school. I am afraid of office work (9-5) environment, because i lose focus if i am in one location for long period at a time. i now only apply for jobs that pays low wage because of the freedom and flexibility it affords me but it does not seem to get me out of poverty. i have stack upon stack of student loans and cant seem to find my way out of it. i find it harder to keep a close relationship in my personal and work life .. as a result i always feels like no one is on my side. i usually start a job believing i will be fired because of all my experiences. recently i have come to a conclusion that i cannot seem to make it here in the USA, perhaps i must move and live overseas as i know the standard of living will be lower and with my savings i can start a small buiness do whatever i wanted without the stress of the daily grind. I was recently fired for a job after working for 3 months and the part-time job that i currently have appears to be on a rocky ground. i just want to be able to find a job so that i can work long enough to save to move from here..i am becoming depressed.. HELP!!!
chienpoo chienpoo
2 Responses Feb 29, 2012

"i suffer from major insecurities and always unsure of my skills"

"i usually start a job believing i will be fired"

i think you should try to figure out what you want and why.. sit down and write out what you want and why.. this will help you to find meaning in the jobs you work as a stepping stone

also try to figure out the root of your insecurities.. give it all some thought.. and try to give yourself some credit because you have a negative self-talk that is self-defeating

I too have problems holding down jobs so I sympathize; <br />
Maybe you could look into government funded assistance programs and financial aid at local colleges to upgrade your skills which will also help with your confidence. <br />
Talking to a community appointed counselor could help with your anxiety and attention deficit concerns which will help with your focus and overall quality of life allowing you to go for jobs that require more attention and pay more<br />
<br />
It is very commendable that you are trying so hard and planning for the future of your family, you could consider moving over seas if it will help to ease the burden and offer some freedom in your life<br />
I wish you all the best and am sure your perseverance will pay off