Consistency Issues.

Im 19 and like everyone here I cant keep a job. I dropped out of school and was afraid to get my first job because I knew Id give up and just call in all the time like I did with school. I feel like I cant find the motivation to keep going. I always start of strong and excitedand after sometime I just quit going. When I think I dont feel like going then thats it there no changing me. Its like something or someone else takes control and I cant stop it but the truth is I didnt want to stop it but the other half of me really wants to go and be an adult and push like the rest of the world.

I love to write and I really aspire to write a series of books and always thought that would be my income mainly but like everything thing else I start of strong and after a couple chapters I give up. I dont know why. Even simple things like changing my eating habbits( I tend to bored eat) or excersizing. *<---- did I spell that right?*

I feel like somethings wrong with me and I hate myself for it and I feel like Im letting everyone down. I want to get help for it but unfortunalty those who tend to need therapy the most are those who cant afford it. Ive talked to my mom about it and I dont knowif she believes me or just doesnt know how to help me but all she says is that I need to suck it up.

I am afraid to get another job knowing how its going to go. I get very depressed thinking about how I'll never be able to live because I wont be able to afford it. I cant wait to have kids and a family one day but I always think how in the hell can I have kids like this. Im terrorfied that I will be a bad mother cause I wont be able to support them or buy them what they like.

I am a christian so I have prayed to god alot to give me the strength and motivation to keep going and to change but nothing happens. I hate myself for not being able to be stronger and keep going. I just dont know what to do or who to reach out to or how to fix it.

I think I have a problem with a set schedual maybe.
lifeslegend lifeslegend
18-21, F
4 Responses Dec 6, 2012

Hi, I feel for you... I too can't keep a job right now. I'm 20 and have had low entry positions and something always gets me fired(though I don't always know what) I think it'd be beneficial if you *could* get therapy,though I know it can be expensive, but you might find out there may be underlying issues and ways to cope/manage them. I have anxiety/depression. I was told possibly ADD & bipolar disorder,but never got that confirmed. I'm hoping to return to therapy for these disorders and get some medication that will hopefully make me able to focus and concentrate more. I feel sooo low, I feel even worse because I'm poor to begin with and feel like I can't even keep my head above water, I have to stay with my parents...I am glad I at least have shelter,but it's crowded and they aren't tidy! I hate having nothing,more so,knowing my son has nothing and I can't help! I wish you the best!

We are living in times very hard to deal with. Some of us can adapt and fit in well. I dont have an answer to your problem other than to choose a job you think you will enjoy and brings an element of meaning and reward to your life.

it sounds like you need someone to motivate you.. sounds like you dont have enough motivation and drive to succeed in something.. you feel comfortable being at home and dont have a need to work even if you dont like the job.. or maybe you just havent found a job that you can be passionate about.. i always motivate all my friends to go to the gym and train and live a healthy life.. sometimes its hard to motivate yourself when you dont have a goal in your life.. if you set yourself some goals you will find you kinda force yourself to work.. maybe you should plan a trip overseas.. so you will need a job to save money and be able to go on your trip.. thats just an example..
i think god gives us the tools to be able to do things for ourselves.. he knows you can do it and so he hasnt answered your prayers.. dont give up.. im sure you can do it :)

I love writing its what I want to do with my life and I cant never finish it. I do set goals like I wanted this beautiful dress from the reniasance fair and I was determined to save for it but half way through I quit going to work and just said whatever and gave up on the dress. I know I must sound like a pitty me parade and I admitt I do that often but I really want so much to just be able to keep going and to change. I dont know where to start or how to keep going and Im afraid to try cause I know I will fail and I dont want make myself feel worse by keep failing. I cant do it alone.

yeah a dress is not something that can push you to do something.. i always do that.. i want something and i always say.. ill give myself a month and if i still want it i will buy it.. funny enough i never get it cause ive forgotten about it after a few days lol have you ever thought about going to see a motivational speaker.. they are pretty good.. they get you hyped up and really into a positive attitude..
people say im pushy but i like to say i motivate lol i have a thing about lazy people.. i like knowing people are always doing things.. keeps the mind busy.. no time to stress and get deppressed..

My problem is I lose the motivation quickly. When I first start I can doit just fine but I guess I get bored and unmotivated. lol every year I go I search the entire time until I find a to die for dress. Its been almost 3 months and if I could go back and get I would without hesitation. Ive always wanted one becuase their so elegant and beautiful and handmade and well I love the reniasance time.

I'm the same way. I just had to take a semester off of school. I never had a job for over a month. I'm inconsistent because of my ADHD and I guess bipolar too is what the doctor says. I feel like things are harder for me to do than other people. I know that sounds unrealistic like maybe I'm just lazy. I do apply myself the best I can. I love to read and to learn. I want to start up my own company eventually, but I havent shown myself any consitancy ever so I'm not sure if I will dedicate myself everyday towards my own business because I never know when I'm going to be depressed. I wish there was a medication out there that actually works but I haven't found anything so far.

I couldnt even finish high school. I can never get my self up and just go. Im afraid to get another job becuase I know how it will turn out and I dont want to make myself feel worse by always failing.