I Am Not Over It

This seems like the perfect time to move on from the past in almost every way. But I am having trouble letting go of the past and getting over the feelings I have carried with me all these years. I can't get over what a repressed childhood/teen years I lived...I was so repressed, depressed and oppressed all that time. And now my little sister gets to do what she wants where she wants however she wants and my mom never let me do anything when I was her age. I just feel like it's not fair somehow that my mom was so over protective of me...I was a shy girl who never acted out or misbehaved anyways and my sister is lazy and failing half her classes and my mom to be honest doesn't care because she doesn't even have time for her. She always made me feel like everyone could do anything but not me. I would feel so horrible like good things weren't meant for me. Of course she never cared about the way I felt or all the horrible things I thought about myself. She always made me feel like I was inferior to everyone. I always believed her and I was so depressed for all those years. She always treated me like I was so insignificant. The things she would say about the way I looked and that my friends didn't like me because I was immature and annoying or that my friends didn't even want to hang out with me because I didn't have any money. She would just say things like that because it never crossed her mind that those things could hurt me. Now I can't let go of all that. My sister comes and goes, comes and goes and my mom and dad never say anything...they never criticize her. I love my sister very much and I don't resent her. It's my parents I don't understand why they had to be that way towards me. It hurts and I cant let go of the past. When I think that I was just a child I dont understand why they had to treat me that way. I cant stop feeling this.