Today was my first experience visiting a jail inmate.  It was my youngest son.  I thought I was doing okay until I got home. I fell to my knees and sobbed and crawled around sobbing like a crazy person. This feels like a nightmare and I can't wake up. To see my good looking, muscular son behind a glass and I couldn't hug him was overwhelming.
He suffers from drug addictions and I guess they have him so bad that even jail didn't scare him enough to stop. He was trying not to cry and so was I.  I feel like it's my fault, but I tried to raise him to be a productive person.  He is a good person, but drugs got him.  How could I let this happen? I am his mother and I'm supposed to protect him. I couldn't. Dear God, I couldn't.

naturenanny naturenanny
51-55, F
Sep 12, 2010